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Unity08 Leaves the Java Mike On

Oh, man, this is funny. Unity08 apparently isn’t familiar with its own software, and so doesn’t know that its background chatter as its “chat” gets ready to go goes straight out to the public. Here’s a sampler of their talk back and forth, just a few minutes old:

Mon Jan 29 07:52:02 PST 2007
u08moderator: bill, are you here? i’m tinkering with the interface to see if i get it…

Mon Jan 29 07:57:17 PST 2007
u08moderator: Do you agree that Jim Cook is a jackass?
Mon Jan 29 07:57:17 PST 2007
u08moderator: I think he’s a wretched M______ F_______.
Mon Jan 29 07:58:49 PST 2007
u08moderator: Anya Harris is a slave driver
Mon Jan 29 08:03:20 PST 2007
u08moderator: Melissa, can you get this?

Mon Jan 29 08:07:18 PST 2007
anya_harris: Why did you file suit against the FEC, you ass…
Mon Jan 29 08:07:18 PST 2007
tom_collier: Because we hate them./

Oh, dear. What happened to ending the politics of hatred, division and personal attacks? Apparently asking for the financial transparency that Unity08 itself explicitly committed to is enough to bring out the swear words in the staff room.

Don’t worry, sweeties, I don’t take it personally. I know that potty mouths and personal digs are part of the game, even if you all say in public that Unity08 is about ending that. Just, please, answer my questions. Even jackasses and M______ F_______ deserve financial transparency, don’t you think? I hear the FEC says so (God, I hate them).

P.S. Do try to bone up on your computer skills before you run the world’s first national secure online presidential nomination. Only one year’s time, Unity08… crack those books!

14 comments to Unity08 Leaves the Java Mike On

  • Jim

    So what would you say: Am I more a Jackass or a M____ F____ for asking Unity08 questions? Maybe a M_____ F____ing Jackass? Or Jack, the M_____ F____ing ass?

    And do you hate the FEC too? They’re such meanies, aren’t they? Regulation this, law that, disclosure the other thing. Blah, blah, blah…

  • Vynce

    that’s great.

    are the censoring underscores yours or theirs?

    sadly, the MSM is also too tech-ignorant to make a story of this.

  • Jim

    Theirs. I’m not a Mother Fucker, see, I’m just a M____ F____.

    Maybe that means I’m a Messy Freighter.

  • Jim

    Guess what. I posted the above transcript on Unity08, and… they deleted it. I guess when they said they’re a “people’s movement,” they only meant some people.

    Oh, wait. I’m a “jackass,” not a person. See, it doesn’t say “Jackass’s movement.” When the donkeys all get together, they can have their own organization, I guess. But the jackasses don’t get to post on Unity08.

  • Shane Kinkennon, Unity08

    A personal apology for the silliness in the warm-up to the Unity08 chat today. We were rehearsing the functionality and got punchy – but that’s no excuse. And we certainly didn’t know it would populate in public. As the resident jokester, it was my error and I take responsibility for it.

    Candidly, I have a healthy respect for the questions you pose. You keep us on our toes, and frankly, it’s appreciated. Certainly by me.

    I also busted Anya Harris’ chops during our run-through, who is a colleague and friend. And she was in the chat room when i did it. No consolation for you, of course. But no one was spared.

    Anyway, I hope you’ll accept my most sincere apologies. Among colleagues and friends, I’m a jokester. Typically, it’s a victimless affair. This time, it was not.

  • Bob S-K

    My God. This is hilarious. Is this the first time they’ve deleted a post on their site? Is this a new low for them?

  • Jim

    Well, Shane, only you know whether you think I’m a Jackass and a MotherFucker. You’re a communications specialist and so you know the thing to do now is to apologize, since you can’t delete what’s on Irregular Times like you deleted the material on your own website. But you’re either insincere in your insults, or you’re insincere in your apologies. Either way, you’ve got to be insincere in some regard, so I don’t see why I should trust what you say.

    What you need to do now is either move on to the rehab stage of apology (which I think is really tacky), or to explain why Unity08’s lawyer hates the FEC and why questions about financial transparency cause such anger within the organization.

    Either that, or you need to ignore it like you and the Unity08 organization have continued to ignore my questions.

    Your choice.

  • Unity 08 – full of spin and doubletalk. I love it!

    In private, Unity 08 calls grassroots activists jackasses and Mother Fuckers. In public, they say you’re “appreciated”.

  • Bob S-K

    Why would a person consider a jackass someone who asks legitimate questions?

  • George

    What was the outcome of the chat, did you get to ask a question? Do you have the rest of the transcript (it looks like Unity08 is slow in updating this to their website, and yours may be a more accurate copy)

    Looking forward to seeing a review of the chat in general, as I wasn’t able to log on.

  • Ralph

    Wow. That’s too funny.

    Of course, in public relationsese, “We appreciate your feedback, thanks very much for your continued interest in Unity ’08,” is equivalent of the English, “Shut up you jackass motherfucker, I hate you as much as the FEC.”

    News flash to public relations people: We don’t actually believe what you say, ever. We just don’t have a choice, because EVERYBODY in power talks to us like that, all the time.

    Well, Unity ’08, I’ve got a little something I’d like to say to you in public relationsese:

    I appreciate your efforts to return honesty and openness to the political process. Thanks very much for your continued hard work, and I wish you success.

    Now translate that into English, you jackass mother fuckers.

  • Jim

    I posed 14 questions, and they non-answered one-third of one of them:

    In seeking an official Advisory Opinion on its correct designation as an organization (527 vs. PAC), Unity08 specifically stated that “The FEC will determine whether or not we are a political committee for FEC purposes. Obviously we will follow their opinion.” On another page, Unity08 posed and answered its own question: “Would you and your candidates have to abide by FEC regulations? Of course.” Yet when the FEC’s advisory opinion was issued, informing Unity08 of the need to register as a PAC within 10 days, Unity08 ignored it for two months, and then filed a lawsuit against the FEC.

    tom_collier(A) Recently, we filed an appeal of the FEC advisory opinion in Federal Court in Washington, D.C. Until the Court has ruled on that appeal, it is not appropriate to register with the FEC. Therefore, as soon as the Court has ruled on our appeal, we will comply with the results of that decision.

    They didn’t even post the full question:

    [Attention to Thomas Collier: In case I am permitted only one question, this is the one question I would most like to see answered — specifically, please.]

    Unity08 has made a number of pledges in the past.

    A) Unity08 has in multiple places indicated that it is committed to funding solely by small-dollar donations of no more than $5,000 (link|link|link|link|link|link). Yet in its lawsuit filed against the Federal Election Commission (FEC) on January 10, 2007 in DC District Court, Unity08 specifically requests exemption from any “obligation to register with the FEC, report its receipts or expenditures, or limit the amount of donations that it receives from contributors or the amount that it expends.” Unity08 also states in the lawsuit that “it should accept donations from individuals, which may be in the form of loans, without limitation as to the amount.” Unity08 further states in its lawsuit that were it able to be freed of FEC regulation, “Unity08 would seek and receive much larger donations and loans from willing contributors.”

    B) In seeking an official Advisory Opinion on its correct designation as an organization (527 vs. PAC), Unity08 specifically stated that “The FEC will determine whether or not we are a political committee for FEC purposes. Obviously we will follow their opinion.” On another page, Unity08 posed and answered its own question: “Would you and your candidates have to abide by FEC regulations? Of course.” Yet when the FEC’s advisory opinion was issued, informing Unity08 of the need to register as a PAC within 10 days, Unity08 ignored it for two months, and then filed a lawsuit against the FEC.

    C) In the summer of 2006, Unity08 pledged to update its financial disclosures twice a month. It broke this pledge. In the fall of 2006, Unity08 pledged to update its financial disclosures once a month. It also broke this pledge.

    Are there other current pledges being made by Unity08 that it plans to break, or is considering breaking?

    And the answer to the 1/3 of one of the 14 questions I posed was simply a restatement that Unity08 had no intention of following their earlier pledges to follow the FEC’s advisory opinion.

    I do have a transcript, George, and I will check my copy against their copy tonight. And don’t worry — look tomorrow for a review of Tom Collier’s answers, and an identification of his non-answers.

  • Anonymous

    I tried to register for their online discussion when I got home from work through the link they sent to my Email, but they didn’t even send a return automated courtesy message. I don’t see any transcript posted online, or even any reference to the discussion. I have seen similar online discussions posted elsewhere in real time, but where is even a transcript for this one? I would really like to read it.

    In all fairness, isn’t “Are there other current pledges being made by Unity08 that it plans to break,” sort of as non-hostile a question as “Is there anyone else you plan to stop beating when you stop beating your wife”? Not that credibility isn’t an issue here.

    On second thought, if they are deleting Jim’s posts, and if they are willing to call him names in private but not in public, I would trust Jim’s transcript more than I would trust Unity08’s, and I would prefer to read the IT version before I see what Counselor Collier has to say.

  • Anonymous

    Last night I received an Email response from Unity08 with a link to the transcript.

    If they sent a lawyer instead of a policy person to speak for the organization, does that mean they are more interested in concealing information than in explaining?

    First they say only small donations are ethical, then they file a lawsuit so they can get big donations. Then they say they don’t trust fat-cat lobbyists and it turns out their whole organization is made up of lobbyists.

    They do seem to be flip-flopping.

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