Unity08 Fibber of the Day: Martin J. Longo of Marlborough
Congratulations, Unity08! You are already bringing Americans into politics, helping them, er… fraudulently claim authorship of letters to the editor that they didn’t really write at all. Oh, dear, that’s not so good, is it?
Yes, with its request that “that you write, type, or cut/paste the following letter to the editor of your local newspaper,” Unity08 has convinced Martin J. Longo to submit the following letter to the Framingham, Massachusetts MetroWest Daily News with the false claim that he is the author of it:
America will be in trouble if it doesn’t act quickly on the crucial issues before us – the economy, education, energy dependence, the environment, health care, immigration, terrorism, and more.
I am a member of a movement called Unity08 that will bring our politics back to common ground and elect leadership to the White House that will actually lead.
Politics as we know it – politics as usual – is over. Unity08 will provide access to information, discussion, and decision-making tools that will change politics forever. And just in time. Eight of every 10 Americans think Washington is so polarized that it is paralyzed. The 2008 election is a moment of truth.
Unity08’s new approach will: 1) Enable Americans to rank our most crucial issues. 2) Force the candidates to address those crucial issues. 3) In June, empower all Americans to choose a bipartisan ticket in a secure vote online. 4) In November, elect the Unity08 Ticket to our nation’s highest office.
Unity08 combines our oldest values and our newest technology to reactivate the American community. And then, America can be a proud country again, worthy of inspiring both our children and the world.
As a member of Unity08, I invite you to learn more about our movement at Unity08.com (www.unity08.com). Please feel free to direct any questions to me or firstname.lastname@example.org
MARTIN J. LONGO,
Congratulations, Martin! Every single word of that letter of “yours” was actually written by a hack in Unity08’s corporate P.R. division! Not a single, solitary word was written by you. Oh, I take that back. You wrote “Martin J. Longo.” The name is yours. Or was. Now your name belongs to Unity08. The rest is written by a Unity08 operative, and now you’re a Unity08 sheep, branded and everything.
Yes, the Sheep of the Day award goes to you, Martin J. Longo! Keep it up, and you’ll get exactly the government you deserve. Let out a big “Baaaaaaa” for us. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaa!