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Why Jesus Would Not Vote For Obama

Republicans are literally being driven insane by their hate for Barack Obama. When I say insane, I mean insane. Crazy.

Crazy is talking about someone who lived in the Middle East thousands of years ago, and thinking that it’s a relevant issue. That’s just what commentator Jill Stanek did in an article for WorldNetDaily – a kooky right wing publication that includes advertisements for “combat training” that “the army doesn’t want you to know”.

Why Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama is Stanek’s headline. Oh, it’s true that Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama, but it isn’t for the reasons that Stanek babbles on about.

Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama because he was a citizen of the Roman Empire who died two thousand years ago.

Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama because he was not registered to vote.

Jesus would not vote for Barack Obama because he didn’t even know that North America existed, and so would have a very difficult time getting to the polls.

What are we going to hear the Republicans write about next? Why Cleopatra would not vote for Obama? Don’t put it past them.

6 comments to Why Jesus Would Not Vote For Obama

  • Stan

    Although I disagree with political misuse of the Name of Christ I believe YOU are mistaken about some matters of His Kingdom.

    He died 2000 years ago but arose in 3 days so He is still alive, and he did know that North America existed since he was there when it was created.

    He doesn’t need a way to the polls, he is always there and he knows why you vote for your candidate.

    He would probably not Vote for any of the candidates because He is not a politician and I think would refuse to consider politics a viable force in His kingdom. If you are the King why would it be necessary to vote for anyone?

    He was never a “Citizen” of the Roman Empire. He is a Jew and He was crucified. Roman citizens were exempt from crucifixion.

    I apologize that my fellow believers do not always mirror Christ when they spread miss-information (gossip) about other people. In short, “All have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God”. Jesus Loves Barack Obama and His sacrifice coveres his sins as well as mine.

    His Grace is sufficient.

    Stan

  • Stan

    P.S.

    Jesus only got one vote and He voted for every candidate in these elections. He died Once, For all.

    Stan

  • So, Stan, you’re saying that Jesus has become a walking zombie who follows people around and spies on their political activities?

    Creepy.

    He’s also, apparently, an illegal immigrant who intends to vote illegally in the presidential election.

  • I agree that it is ridiculous for someone to write why Jesus wouldn’t vote for a candidate, but your points come across as belittling of the Christian faith rather than the Republican misuse of religion.

  • Ralph

    How very convenient for the continued Republican misuse of religion that criticizing it comes across as belittling of the Christian faith.

    Jesus belittled the petty, corrupt religious leaders of his day. But now it looks like atheists are acting more like Jesus than Christians.

  • Phil

    Personally I don’t think that His name should be used in so petty a manner but reading this story I have my doubts on what Fitzer’s trying to say – are you trying to make a statement? or just complaing about the republicans?

    Firstly you write as if Stanek meant that Jesus is literally planning to come down from heaven and vote… and you’re completely ignoring Staneks actual story!! I mean come on, you didn’t seriously think that she meant it literally did you – She was talking about infanticide and the only thing you felt like writing about was the title?

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