Apparently unable to find any actual waitresses or teachers in the state of Maine who oppose gay marriage, James Stiles of the anti-gay Stand for Marriage Maine will be hiring an actress to pretend to be a waitress who is against same-sex marriage. The pretend waitress will pretend to sound sincere in an actual TV advertisement set to air before Maine voters decide whether to keep their marriage equality law. SMM’s thought is that if someone dresses up like a waitress, the people of Maine will listen and vote accordingly.
Also being hired for another TV spot: an actress to dress up and pretend to be a lady teacher talking about her pretend experience with, um, gay people getting married during study hall?
Are you a “teacher type” or a “working waitress type?” If you are, I am not suggesting that you show up from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. Wednesday (Sept. 2) at the Howard Johnson in South Portland, Maine, conveniently located at the intersection of I-95 (Exit 45) and Route 1 Main Street. I am not suggesting that you show up and offer your own “audition” in which you show your opinion as a “working waitress type” or “teacher type.” I am not suggesting that bring along some other “working waitress types” or “teacher types” and actively demonstrate how such types actually feel.
Goodness heavens me, no. Such displays of reality would disrupt the pretense, and we can’t have that, now can we?