Browse By

Orgone Quackery At Work In The Prophecy Wars

I’ve been tracking the prophecies of independent Christian preacher Pamela Rae Schuffert this month. Schuffert has predicted that the New World Order will take over the United States through a NATO orchestrated martial law by July 1 this year. Specifically, she has predicted that the borders will be closed, and we’ll all be trapped within a military dictatorship by July 1. She says that Yahweh tells her it’s so.

It’s just five days now until July 1, the supposed end of democracy in the USA. So, one would think that Pamela Rae Schuffert would be busy, warning us all of the terrible things to come before next week is over.

Of course, there isn’t any sign at all of an impending NWO martial law coup d’etat. So, Schuffert appears to have moved on from this particular false prophecy onto other matters. Her faith in her own prophetic powers doesn’t seem to have wavered at all.

Most recently, Schuffert’s writings have returned to a favorite subject of hers: Linda Newkirk. Linda Newkirk is a former friend and religious associate of Schuffert, but for some years now, the two have been at odds with each other, preaching rival prophecies in a kind of evangelistic grudge match. The argument appears to have begun over a missing purse.

Schuffert now writes that Linda Newkirk is a witch and an agent of Satan. Newkirk has responded, however, by asserting that she is the “true prophet”. As any prophet would, Newkirk has prayed to her god and received the following direct word from heaven, denouncing Schuffert:

“So says Jehovah the Most High God To Pamela Schuffert. I shall walk on you like a giant, who walks over a matchstick, and with my fury I shall pulverize you into the ground; for you are a mocker an a scorner and a lying manipulator! You have come out against My true prophet, spewing lies and filth, and you will not win! The President of this world is now in the Lake of Fire for the evil He did to My Anointed. Do you believe that you are any better off! Within a month, I shall too carry you into this Lake of Fire if you do not repent. There is one and only one between the two of you, who is lying, and that is you! No more will I tolerate what I have tolerated in the past! You will either repent or you shall perish. I am Jehovah, Most High God!”

Well over a month has passed since this prophecy from Linda Newkirk. By all appearances, Pamela Rae Schuffert has not been cast into a lake of fire.

Newkirk isn’t the only modern day Christian prophet who criticizes Pamela Rae Schuffert, however. Sherry Shriner accuses Linda Newkirk of being a government agent sent to destroy the prophetic Christian underground. Shriner also accuses Schuffert of being a “a servant of Horus and the NWO” and a “handmaiden to Satan” working to help the forces of darkness. “The Lord told me how “they” use her as a pawn and use her to create fear so they can feed off the energy/loosh it creates,” Shriner writes.

But how does Shriner know all this about Pamela Rae Schuffert? She ran a Bible Code on Schuffert, and the truth was revealed.

How can we protect ourselves from so many false prophets? Sherry Shriner has a suggestion: She urges us to buy orgone concentrating devices that she sells through PayPal, and use them to create “orgone charged water” that can then be put into super soaker squirt guns and sprayed all over the place to create the following benefits:

– protection from demonic beings
– eradication of infestations of evil extraterrestrials
– improvement of fuel efficiency
– defense against mind control rays emanating from cell phone towers
– burns giants who stomp all around your house
– counteract fluoride in drinking water
– stops thunderstorms

orgone squirt gun from sherry shriner

Shriner claims that she has already had great success fighting evil with orgone: “My Orgone has destroyed the Capricorn Star-Ship, the Shema star-ship, Planet X – Comet Elenin, and thousands of UFOs! It Works Folks! It’s the Only thing that works against Alien-Demonic-Zombie-Vampire- beings! The “dead” hate it! The Aliens hate it! Politicians who have been soul-scalped by Reptilians hate it! Obama hates the White House, Michelle sleeps in Hotels around D.C…the White House Senior Staff meets in air-sealed rooms under the Capitol…why?? Because they HATE the Orgoned air in D.C. !”

But what exactly is orgone? I searched through piles of babble about “Annunaki giants” and extraterrestrial conspiracies, and still I couldn’t find a definition of orgone.

The Skeptic’s Dictionary helped me out with this problem. It turns out that orgone is a concept that was invented by a quack named Wilhelm Reich back in the early 20th century. Orgone was supposed to be a substance pervading the universe, a life force that could bestow miraculous powers and health benefits when concentrated with devices developed and sold by Reich.

The orgone distilleries sold by Orgone were never proven effective, and Reich’s business was shut down by the FDA. Believers in orgone continue to assert that their orgonic devices have been proven effective, but whenever the devices are tested by non-believers, they don’t seem to work at all.

The orgonomists who continue to promote the sale of orgone products even claim to have produced an orgone accumulator, which, using the power of orgone, enhances orgasms to heights of previously unimagined bliss. If this orgone orgasm device really worked, though, wouldn’t use of the device have spread more widely? Well, researchers at the Orgone Laboratory do claim to have had “sex-economic work” which has “withstood the most rigorous cross-cultural testing”.

Say no more, vicar. Say no more.

2 thoughts on “Orgone Quackery At Work In The Prophecy Wars”

  1. anon says:

    Here’s more on the subject:
    Suggest not to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

    1. F.G. Fitzer says:

      You mean, I shouldn’t throw the invisible baby that no one can see or hear or touch, out with the bathwater? How would I know if I had? Really?

      Hey, honey, I think I left the orgone back at the bus stop, but I’m not sure. Why don’t we pray on it to see if we’re still orgonified?

      I gotta get me a business model like this one: I’ve Porgoney for sale. It’s invisible, you can’t smell it, doesn’t weight anything, and your hands pass through it, but it’s got miraculous properties and I’ll sell it to you for $50 a box!

      If you truly believed in this orgone garbage, you’d sign your real name here instead of “anon”. After all, your orgone would banish away the evil of people making fun of you, right?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Psst... what kind of person doesn't support pacifism?

Fight the Republican beast!