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Top 5 Ways To Make a Killer First Impression

5. While shaking hands, stare into the other person’s eyes with intense focus, while darting your tongue out of the corner of your mouth every 5 seconds.

4. Interrupt conversations periodically by turning your head, looking up and to the left, saying, “Stop it, mother! Why can’t you just let me be myself?”

3. Get up in the middle of meetings, and leave the room, with the excuse that you have to “return to the scene”.

2. Splatter blood all over your clothes.

1. Kill someone.

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Psst... what kind of person doesn't support pacifism?