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7 thoughts on “Certified Complete”

  1. Peregrin Wood says:

    Didn’t you read the fine print at the bottom of your certificate? Education has now become a form of insurance – indemnification against somebody looking stupid at some point in the future.

  2. Charles Manning says:

    They misspelled “overlords.”

    1. Jim Cook says:

      Nyet! Nein! Nichts! Rien! Zut! Hayir! Nej! The Edupolizeisrechtungbureau has verified this never, ever happened! The little red book is also in concordance.

  3. Tom says:

    Don’t feel bad, I got a certificate for attending a mandatory faculty start-up meeting that went over the same crap, with the same tired “we’re doing great” speech by the Dean (who may as well be the CFO) that we’ve been through the last at least 10 years. It’s the new faux accomplishments idea that’s making the rounds through corporate America.

  4. Mark says:

    Don’t you realize that this sort of annual exercise (I have to do it too) is not to help prevent workplace harassment. It’s to protect your employer from a lawsuit should one of its employees be harassed by another. Then the employer can simply say that they provided appropriate training to all their employees so anything that happened is not their fault.

    Speaking of annual exercises in wasting time, since I work in a science laboratory at a medical university I also have to pass annual certifications in animal care, HIPPA standards, hazardous waste management, and workplace safety, even though I have been doing the same job (successfully, I should add) for over a decade.

  5. Bill says:

    I’ve so been there…having to page through these excruciating “training” things. However they do present an obvious market opportunity for some bright young entrepreneurial programmer to develop a browser plug-in that will auto-click the ‘Next’ button every two minutes and select the ‘right’ answers on the test. I mean, c’mon, that ain’t rocket science.

    1. Bill says:

      I once tried to use an Amazing Drinking Duck to click through one of these things for me, but my mouse didn’t like being underwater.

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