“I now believe global warming alarmists are unpatriotic racists knowingly misleading for their own ends. Good night.”
So wrote Pat Sajak, a man who has become famous for his expertise in asking people whether they’d like to buy a vowel. Sajak’s Tweet isn’t unique in its stubborn refusal to acknowledge that global warming is a serious problem, but it is special in its densely packed combination of incoherence and paranoia.
Just how is concern about global warming unpatriotic? How is it racist? What possible personal gain could environmentalists achieve through their activism?
Let’s put politics and environmental issues aside just for a minute, and dip into the the guilty pleasure of Sajak’s mental rhythm. His tweet was a poetic blurt, a five second surrealist trip.
Can it be repeated? Can you capture the style of Pat Sajak in your own outburst? Let’s try together. I’ll offer a few attempts, and you see what you can produce.
“I now believe civil libertarians are sexist Nazis knowingly dissembling for their own ends. Have a bagel.”
“I now believe striking McDonalds workers are unstylish corporate lobbyists knowingly wandering around for their own ends. Duck!”
“I now believe United Nations workers are morally relativistic homophobes knowingly composting for their own ends. Mahalo.”
What do you think? Did I get the strange essence that is Sajak speak? It’s actually quite difficult to express unhinged misanthropism. Can you give it a shot?