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Taking out the Terrorists with your Handgun: No Bag Limit… or No Bag?

Every time I see this sticker on a car or truck in the United States, I roll my eyes:

Special Issue - Resident - Lifetime License -- United States TerroristHunting Permit -- Permit No. 91101 -- Gun Owner -- No Bag Limit

“Gun Owner — No Bag Limit,” the “terrorist hunting permit” reads. There’s a pistol in the background.  The message isn’t too subtle: thanks to the 2nd Amendment and gun ownership rights, those terrorists are on the run, and everyday citizen folk are ready to put some lead right between their eyes, just as soon as…

… as soon as there’s an actual terrorist appearing in front of a gun-toting American, wearing his “I signed up to be a terrorist and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!” shirt (this is how you know they’re terrorists, see).  And how many times has this actually happened?  How many times has the limitless “bag limit” been invoked?  Exactly how many times has an actual citizen shot an actual terrorist with actual handgun in the United States since 2001?  X-box games and fictional episodes of 24 don’t count.

The number is zero.  This bumper sticker isn’t about actually shooting down terrorists.  It’s about posing and roaring.

The stickers are getting old.  The posers and roarers need something new to pose and roar with.  I suggest lycra suits and superhero names.  You know, something like The Handsome Panther:

The Handsome Panther.  Roar!

Rrrrrawr.

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