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Gotta Be Tailgating?

You breed dogs to sell in Ontario; you drive like a freak in Cato.  Your chattel incessantly hump legs; I watched you incessantly hump bumpers. You make those who purchase your dogs promise not to spay or neuter right away; your need for speed right now endangers lives on the highway.

“Gotta Be Goldens,” you’re going to kill someone if you keep driving like I saw you driving this summer.

Gotta Be Goldens, Tailgating Summer 2015 in Central New York

You’ll notice I can’t read your license plate in this picture I took from the passenger’s seat.  That’s a result of what’s called a safe following distance.  Please look it up.

Apparently, I’m not the only person so frustrated with a driver that I’ve decided to post a story on the internet.  There’s this example taken from stop-and-go traffic in Fairfax, Virginia, and over at Platewire, posters share identifying information about reckless drivers.  The Australians are upset by this behavior, too.


4 thoughts on “Gotta Be Tailgating?”

  1. Kathy Hearn says:

    I apologize for the way my boyfriend was driving on Friday. He was trying to get home so that I could attend my nieces wedding that afternoon and stay home to babysit newborn puppies. I am sorry for his actions and will speak with him about this post. Please accept my apology.

    1. Jim Cook says:

      Thank you for the apology. However, my experience wasn’t on a Friday, wasn’t this month, and was on a drive toward Syracuse, not toward Ontario. This indicates your vehicle has a chronic problem. Please address it.

      1. Kathy Hearn says:

        I just assumed based on the date you posted, that it may of been Friday as he did drive towards Syracuse that day. Sorry for the assumption. He is on the road driving 5 days a week.

  2. thedogfacedboy says:

    Very nice that you threw in “from the passenger’s seat”…..

    I almost believe you.

    From “safeny”:


    New York prohibits all drivers from using portable electronic devices.

    Illegal activity includes holding a portable electronic device and:

    Talking on a handheld mobile telephone
    Composing, sending, reading, accessing, browsing, transmitting, saving, or retrieving electronic data such as e-mail, text messages, or webpages
    Viewing, taking, or transmitting images

    If you took that while driving, which I somewhat suspect, then you might be guilty of breaking the law as well. Most 315ers are usually guilty of scratching themselves somewhere, like their a_sses when driving, but if that’s not you, I apologize.

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