Urgent Homeland Threats To Be Addressed By Congress… Next Week
A week from today, the Republican-led Homeland Security Committee of the U.S. House of Representatives will be holding a hearing to examine “the growing threat America and the West face from ISIS and other terrorist groups, Russia and Iran’s actions in Syria, the impacts of the refugee crisis in Europe on America’s security, homegrown terrorism, cybersecurity, and other threats to the homeland.”
These are serious threats to the Homeland that must be addressed by the federal government, or else… but they can wait until next week, because right now, the U.S. House of Representatives is on vacation. While ordinary Americans get just one day off for Columbus Day, if they get any time off at all, the Republican-led Congress takes a week off.
Rest assured, Republican members of Congress are not slacking off during this extended vacation. On the contrary, they are busy patrolling the homeland, on the lookout for terrorists and Latinos.
In related news, 14 years after the Department of Homeland Security was established, a team of explorers has finally discovered where the Homeland actually is. As the photograph below shows, the Homeland is a parcel of about 20 acres in the Dry Valley of Nebraska. Now that we know where it is, we can focus our defenses against evildoers there.