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MICROPHONES!

MY FELLOW AMERICANS, I STAND BEFORE YOU TODAY TO TELL YOU A STORY ABOUT A YOUNG KID GROWING UP IN TEXARKANA. HE AND HIS FAMILY DIDN’T HAVE MUCH, BUT THEY HAD LOVE, AND THIS LITTLE BOY HAD A DREAM, THAT ONE DAY HE WOULD SPEAK AT A MAJOR POLITICAL PARTY’S NOMINATING CONVENTION. AND THEN THIS LITTLE BOY GREW UP, AND SOMEONE TOLD HIM, “YOUNG MAN, YOU WILL NEVER SPEAK AT A MAJOR POLITICAL PARTY’S NOMINATING CONVENTION.” BUT THEN HE DID, AND THAT BOY IS ME, AND I STAND BEFORE YOU TONIGHT TO SAY THAT NEITHER I NOR ANY OF MY FELLOW SPEAKERS HAVE FIGURED OUT THAT WE DON’T NEED TO SHOUT DURING THE WHOLE DARNED SPEECH BECAUSE MICROPHONES NOT ONLY EXIST, BUT ARE PLACED BEFORE OUR VERY MOUTHS AND ARE CONNECTED TO AMPLIFIERS. I AM TOLD WE WILL FIGURE THIS OUT, BUT NOT UNTIL WE WATCH THE VIDEO AND CRINGE, WHEN IT IS TOO LATE BECAUSE WE WILL NEVER! BE! INVITED! BACK! GOD BLESS AMERICA!

One thought on “MICROPHONES!”

  1. John says:

    LMAO SO TRUE!!!!!!!!

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Psst... what kind of person doesn't support pacifism?

Fight the Republican beast!