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Airport Security 50 Years From Now

Half a century from now, airport security will be formally recognized as the religious ritual that it is. People will go to security chapels in their own neighborhoods to remove their shoes, Empty their bags, and walk through magical gates, relinquishing all large tonsils of liquid, in order to propitiate the demons of terror and summon the supernatural power of security in what they call The Homeland, a mythical land that is simultaneously all around us and impossible to see. The gravestones of soldiers will be decorated with icons of security scanners. On television, the Box News Network will feature analyst-priests who deliver sermons on the immorality of schools that don’t practice lockdowns anymore.

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Psst... what kind of person doesn't support pacifism?

Fight the Republican beast!