Who Would Let Amazon, Google, Apple or the NSA Spy On Them In Their Own Bathroom?
Some time over the next week, Congress is going to vote on whether to allow the National Security Agency to continue to gather electronic surveillance on millions of Americans without any search warrant or other method of determining probable cause to believe that the Americans being spied on are involved in any criminal activity at all.
At the same time, the home plumbing fixture company Kohler is releasing a set of products that help Amazon, Google, and Apple spy on Americans’ most intimate activities – the things they do in the bathroom. Through the data collected by these companies on Americans’ bathroom activities, the NSA will gain the ability to spy on Americans as they sit on the toilet as well.
Kohler Konnect fixtures are designed to send data to and from users’ smartphones, and through the remotely-located voice control software systems operated by Amazon, Apple, and Google. The sinks, mirrors, showers, and toilets in the Kohler Konnect system will thus transmit data about who uses them when, for how long, using what settings. The bathroom will contain an always-on microphone, listening to Americans’ most intimate moments, transmitting that information to a corporate data center, where it will become accessible to government spies as well.
People who put these devices into their bathrooms will no longer be able to go into their own bathrooms with the assurance that they are truly alone and in private.
What the payoff for the people who own these bathroom surveillance devices? They will be able to use their voices to control their bathroom fixtures… but buttons and knobs already perform this job perfectly well, without any privacy violations.
The very idea of a Kohler Konnect “smart toilet” is disturbing. Who wants to shit and piss into something intelligent? The icky relationship with this device gets even more twisted with the toilet’s ability to light up and play the favorite music of the person sitting on it.
What kind of idiot is willing to allow corporate and government spies to know all the personal details of their bathroom habits, just so they can thrust their naked bottoms onto a little disco?
We’ll begin to get the answer to that question when Kohler Konnect sales figures become available.