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Authority Elbows In At The Libertarian Party National Convention

Tomorrow, the 2014 national convention of the Libertarian Party will begin. For a Libertarian convention, the convention looks tightly focused on rules and regulations. The first several events are:

Training Bylaws Committee Meeting Credentials Committee Meeting Convention Registration & Delegate Credentialing

They’re Libertarians, so why can’t they all just agree to show up, and then [...]

Is Collapse Of Time Streams Creating Agricultural Shortages That Only Preppers Will Survive?

Before It’s News, a right wing web site that trades in wild conspiracy theories, usually takes the trouble in each of its articles to plainly state the reasons that disaster is just around the corner. They typically name who’s to blame: The Illuminati, reptilian overlords, aliens from the planet Niburu, or Islamic Marxist Economic Elites.

[...]

Political Group Reinvents A New Direction For The Second Time

What could be more temporally confused than a political group that calls itself Reinventing A New Direction? A direction, if it is truly new, and not merely rehashed elements from an old direction, cannot be reinvented.

How about a group that calls itself Reinventing A New Direction 2014, which is a successor to an organization [...]

The Congressional Candidate For A Nice Long Nap

I’m looking for an answer to a campaign finance oddity. Yesterday, the American Society of Anesthesiologists Political Action Committee declared to the FEC that it had spent $110,000.00 for radio advertisements supporting Patrick Hope, one of many Democrats competing for their party’s nomination to Virginia’s 8th district seat in the U.S. House of Representatives.

[...]

Sajak This!

Can you capture the style of Pat Sajak in your own outburst? Let’s try together. [...]

A Petition For Planetary Liberation

These are dangerous times.

The Cobra Resistance warns us that “there are forces within the banking establishment, military-industrial complex and also on the non-physical planes that do not wish humanity to be free. They have stolen our money. They have poisoned our food. They are trying to take away our freedom. They are trying to [...]

God Crashes Truck into Baltimore TV Station and Is Barricaded Inside

I have found God!

The Boston Globe is reporting that God has stolen a landscaping truck and driven it through the glass windows of the lobby of the headquarters of ABC TV affiliate WMAR in Baltimore, Maryland. God, wearing a backpack, then left the truck and forced His way into the WMAR news studio, where [...]

Bernie Sanders / Bank Of America 2016 Big Data Running Mates For The White House

Bernard Sanders is a frequent critic of Bank of America. So, the senator’s own Twitter feed, as well as Twitter feeds of his supporters, often include the phrase “Bank of America”. Twitter’s predictive system is too stupid, however, to notice that Sanders and his fans are describing Bank of America as heartless, corrupt, abusive, and vile. [...]

How No Screen Week Worked For Me

You may not have heard, but this week was Screen-Free Week – an observance to deal with the growing length of Screen Time. It seems that, year after year, the climate in which we are raising their kids has been supporting a longer period of screen use.

I remember fondly the days when I was [...]

Gay Marriage Causes Plague of Beets!

You can’t blame me for saying that gay people getting married are ruining life for the rest of us by unleashing a flood of salaciously purple root vegetables that nobody really wants to eat in the first place. [...]

Don’t Get Anxious About Cat Accidents!

A Twitter user who posts under the pseudonym Psychonautic Express warns that, “The more tense you are during a cat accident, the more injury you will incur.”

I’ll try to remember that the next time it looks like I’m heading for an accident involving a cat.

Me-ow!

[...]