Irregular Times Diaries: Unfit Discussion

The headline from the Associated Press article reads: “Canada to spend $25M on rainforest plan”. The ticker that runs across the bottom of my mind reads, “What are they trying to hide?”

Of course, you know those Canadians. They’re too polite to use the word “hide” to describe what they’re up to with this conspiracy in the so-called Great Bear Rainforest. They use the word “protect” as a euphemism instead. I can see what’s really going on.

The Canadian government is making it against the law to do any logging in one third of the forest. That means that, in something like 5 million acres of woods, no logs can be removed. Now, why would the Canadians want to do that? It’s not for the backpackers who like to go hiking amongst the ferns. Oh, no. The logs making hiking more difficult, after all.

What logs are really good at is at blocking paths, and blocking roads, preventing people from getting into an area. In the old-growth forests, these logs can get really big, blocking even the biggest of trucks.

So just what is it that’s so important in that Canadian rainforest that the government of Canada doesn’t want us to see it? Are they, perhaps, developing a new generation of nuclear suitcase bombs to send across the open border with the United States, a border that is almost completely free of logs to block the path of infiltrators? Could these Canadian terrorists sit in Starbucks coffee shops in America’s major cities with their deadly suitcases, just waiting for a signal to detonate them, as Tom Tancredo has suggested?

I think we all know what this is about. If logging is not allowed in the Great Bear Rainforest, the terrorists win!