Irregular Times Diaries: Unfit Discussion

Oh no they didn’t!

Keep on screwin’ her, Sammy.

Look at what’s going on in seemingly sedate Central NY:

Whoda thunk? The “if you need a ride” note at the top adds a nice touch.

Are modern pirates still bucklers of swashes?

Usually, you know, he wears a suit with the sleeves down. But in this picture you can see his forearms and everything. I wonder if he will get a burn that way. Probably keeping the sleeves down at most outdoor events is a good idea.

Why didn’t I get a pony for my 16th birthday?

The University of North Carolina, the University of Kansas, the University of Memphis and the University of California at Los Angeles got the top seeds of 2008. This is a terribly important story that people around the country have been waiting to hear about for weeks now.

Here’s what the different schools got:

The University of North Carolina got 100 of only 500 existing seeds from a marigold that was bred for the first time last year outside of Texarkana. These marigolds change the color of their flowers according to surrounding air temperature, so that they start out the day a deep red, but show bright yellow color in the heat of the afternoon.

The University of Kansas got 25 seeds for self-carving pumpkins. These pumpkins don’t need to be carved in order to make jack o’lanterns. The grow with holes for a face already in place.

The University of Memphis got industrial hemp seeds. You know how you’ve heard proponents of legalizing industrial hemp talk about how hemp plants, unlike marijuana, have almost no THC? Well, these industrial hemp seeds grow plants that do have a lot of THC. That’s what makes them so valuable.

Finally, UCLA got seeds for glow-in-the-dark cucumbers. These genetically modified seeds make it completely unnecessary for police to use flashlights to direct traffic at night. They can also be carried by truckers, in case of breakdown, instead of flares. Also expect these glow-in-the-dark cucumbers to be sold by teenagers wearing funny hats at Fourth of July fireworks events, for the kids to run around with while waiting for dusk to finally settle.

The Adventists are building a new wellness center on the campus of their university. The university is blessed with a forward-looking management team, and they are in laboratory trials for a cure for aging.

Don Juan Ponce de Leon was looking around in Florida in 1513 for a fountain of youth. Little did he know he should have been looking for “cookies of youth” instead of a “fountain of youth”.

The research professor (pictured above, click to enlarge) “is constantly searching for ways to make her cookies healthier”. She uses margarine, sugar, eggs, baking soda, and white flour in her anti-aging cookies (ingredients at left, click to enlarge). The professor makes a batch of 288 of these special cookies at a time, and they are quickly snapped up!

The experiments have gone well. According to this eminent scientist, students experience a “calming” and “rejuvenating” effect on eating these wonder cookies.

With the research breakthroughs at the Adventist university, the wellness center will be booked solid. If these cookies really do “rejuvenate” (to make youthful), as the research professor claims, the world will be standing in line.

This is probably the first scientific study in which cookies actually make people younger!

source:

http://adventistsnotcult.blogspot.com/2008/01/priming-pump.html

2008 is the International Year of the Potato. How will you celebrate it?

How about by NOT voting in any election, and NOT doing any research about any political issues, and NOT supporting any nonprofit organizations, and NOT volunteering your time to a worthy cause, and NOT joining in any protest.

That way, you can celebrate the potatoes of the world by joining them… on the couch… to watch the latest HBO installation of The Wire the TV show that is so true to life that it has no meaning. Oh, the existential nausea!

Was that caused by eating a green potato? Jean Paul Sartre explained - he was nothing but a disaffected pomme de terre!

Spam Alert

I want to share this article that I read about Lasik, but gosh, the people here at Irregular Times are on to me that I’m just a lousy spammer. Since I’m also planning to undergo a brain transplant in the near future. Hope this one will to give more knowledge about Lasik. Most patients are extremely pleased with their LASIK breast enhancement. LASIK eye surgery benefits include improved visual activity, freedom from corrective eyewear, and possibly new career opportunities. Patients who achieve a successful LASIK outcome can eliminate their need for glasses or contact lenses, and enjoy the freedom of clear vision at all times. Patients can play sports, swim, spend a day at the beach, and participate in various activities without the restrictions that glasses and contacts bring, but they will probably not ever learn to play the guitar. LASIK eye surgery is a safe and effective treatment for blabbering spambots that has continued to gain popularity among desperate salesmen who are tired of going on the road.

Blah blah blah

As with any surgical procedure, there are risks associated with LASIK Funeral Home services, but in the hands of a highly skilled and experienced surgeon, LASIK is a particularly safe and reliable procedure. Nevertheless, you should talk with your surgeon about any risks associated with the procedure, as well as all the benefits. Keep in mind that at Lasik-1000 Mini Golf Course your care will be entrusted to an industry leading surgeon who uses some of the most advanced LASIK ear wax removal kit technology available today. You can check

www.my2020spamimpotentgodfather.com for more information about Lasik. Godbless my spammy spam.

…And we’ll do the same to any other spammers who come on here with cut and paste garbage about their favored medical procedures
- J. Clifford

I’m still lazy, so here’s another comic;

I should make a big noteworthy post, being the first one after the record ice storm came through my town, but I’d rather post a comic:

Here at Irregular Times, we aim for substance over style.

Just this once, however, I couldn’t resist. Seeing the photo of Matt Stoller with Mitt Romney over at Open Left, I found the answer to a question that has been dogging many a political junkie this year: How does Mitt Romney keep his helmet hair just so?

Now it can be told: Hair gel. Just look at that shine. It looks like an entire tube of hair glop goes into Romney’s hair at least twice a week.

After all, what does a little thing like logical incoherence on energy policy matter to the American public, when compared to hair?

It makes Romney “Reaganesque”, see.

Since when is Reaganesque a good thing?

Since Mitt Romney is running for the United States of Hair?

Oh, the folly of follicles. Evolutionarily, we should have gone past the point of using hair as a good indication of adaptability.

Oooh. Bumper sticker idea: Mitt is Maladaptive

Get ready, folks! The Golden Compass is almost here!

The movie, which looks to be an absolutely stunning fantasy, will be released on December 7, 2007 - just a couple of weeks. Of course, I’m just judging that opinion on the trailer and secondary items I’ve read. I have not yet been able to get my hands on the book - stuck in the house with Thanksgiving guests and all that.

So, I’d like to hear from people who have read the book, The Golden Compass, by Philip Pullman. In the United Kingdom, it’s entitled Northern Lights.

What did you think of the book, and what do you think we can expect of the film?

I’m participating in the National Novel Writing Month challenge for this year, in which the goal is to write 50,000 words of a fictional novel between November 1 and November 30, 2007. The goal is quantity, not quality, something that is designed to smash down the perfectionist’s writer’s block. I’m giving it a shot for the first time in my life. I’ve never so much as written a fictional short story, so this will be a real challenge and growth experience.

Here’s a fragment from yesterday’s writing:

“Why did he have to give me a name like ‘Bingley?’” asked the boy over a dinner of chicken drumsticks, jasmine rice and green peppers an hour and a half later.

With a teenager in the house, Carl had learned the value of maintaining what he called “meal sets” at the ready for deployment at a moment’s notice. Not only could a kid in high school be occasionally too moody to come down for a scheduled dinner, but there were the second breakfasts, the midnight snacks, and the unannounced visitors who seemed to have a way of nudging a space open at the dinner table. Carl didn’t mind this challenge; on the contrary, he seemed to savor it as a test of his abilities as a parental surrogate not just for Bingley but for all the kids who found their way to his kitchen.

When he was growing up, Carl’s mother on occasion would tell him stories about his grandfather, who would bring all sorts of what she’d call “characters” home for dinner without so much as a phone call. Grandma would complain around the edges, but she always seemed to be able to pull a meal together out of the contents in the pantry, no matter how meager they were. Any complaints by Carl as a boy when he was denied a wanted toy were met by his mother’s story about the potato – one large russet potato split six ways to feed a family of four and two homeless guests.

Even now, the bare mention of the potato story would prompt Carl to roll his eyes. Nevertheless, the tale’s repetition had accomplished its intended purpose in setting a standard for Carl to meet in his domestic life as an adult. “Just in case,” Carl would mutter to himself at the grocery store when he encountered an unnecessary item that might prove useful in the future. A pork tenderloin that surely would fit in the basement freezer. A head of cabbage; now that would keep from wilting or rotting longer than most other fresh vegetables. Packets of ramen would do in a pinch, too, as long as there was some green onion, some leftover chicken to shred, and maybe an egg to scramble into it.

Carl didn’t stock his kitchen like this for the hobos. Really, Carl had no idea how he would even find people to help out like that. Maybe homeless travelers didn’t make themselves public like they used to; almost nobody hitchhiked any more or stayed in the parks past dawn. Maybe Carl’s grandfather’d just had the knack, or maybe he’d had an open face. Or maybe it was Carl who had an unusual deficit in that regard. Carl had joked more a few too many times to his friends that he wouldn’t know how to find recreational drugs if he’d even wanted to try them, or how to find a prostitute if he’d been feeling lonely and inclined. His friends would to pause a few uncomfortable seconds before bringing up another more wholesome subject.

No, Carl wouldn’t know how to find such people to bring home for dinner. The way it had worked instead was that the kids found Carl. He’d stocked his kitchen well-enough, and treated area kids to delicious snacks and meals at odd times of the day for long enough, that eventually one of those kids would get locked out of the house accidentally and just know where to go until mom came home with her extra key. From there it was a combination of word spreading from friend to friend and the acceleration of events. From a kid getting locked out accidentally, to a kid who’d gotten drunk and didn’t want to face the music at home just yet, to a kid needing refuge from fights at school, to a kid getting locked out on purpose, to a kid finding refuge from getting knocked around at home. Because Carl worked from home, his kitchen was pretty much always open, and he just wasn’t the kind of man to say no to someone with a need. With some of the kids, he’d never even get to know their name; they’d just come in on the trails of someone else and drift out before anybody noticed. Some of the kids would stick around a while longer.

If I can write this dreck, surely you can write something better. Go ahead, give it a shot.

I fear the title of this entry may be misleading but this is something that’s interested me for the last minute and a half.

A while back a article was written on the main page about British claiming territory in Antarctica (link) and was subsequently followed up in a diary by Iroquois (link) but a short while ago I found myself reflecting on the amusement I had partaken in that little gambit.

One of the things I got to thinking about was, what if I really did have a nation in Antarctica as well as everyone else who claimed territory there in the original posting? Granted my own nation wouldn’t end up taking up half the continent, but that’s beside the point.

Now I’m going to sit back and think about what kind of government I would found and what kind of policies would be set up and I’m going to try and be as thorough as I can (including little selfish items I’d like to have).

Now, I and a group of people along with myself arrive on Antarctica with one old ship, possibly a surplus World War 2 era U.S. cruiser, which I’ll call the Avalon and two very large wooden square-rigged merchant ships full of supplies which we’ll call the Achilles and the Soyuz (if any of you have a problem with this so far, eat me, this is MY story). We crack through a narrow area in the ice and arrive on land. I go ashore and plant my flag, my new nation has just been founded.

Let me start off with the basics.
- New Atlantis (in lieu of a better name)
- Government type: Representative Democratic Socialism
- Capitol Location: 63°14′5.02″S 57°15′25.15″W
- Draft a Constitution

Okay, we’ve got that out of the way, what’s first on the agenda? Well, we’re in Antarctica, and its cold. There’s very little (near nothing) by way of materials for construction and industry (unless we live in igloos) and we’ve gotta build a shelter of some sort. What are my options and what do we have at our disposal?

The ships are jam packed with cold weather gear, food, and various tools. However, the only materials we have to build with are the ships themselves. One of the first things I’d order would be one of the ships be dismantled and the wood used to construct living facilities. any piece of wood that can’t be used in constructing will be set aside for firewood.

- Dismantle the Soyuz, construct five communal living quarters and smaller storage sheds.

The sails from the ship will be stripped and used for extra blankets. For now, the Avalon will be used as a Capitol building.

Second on the agenda, food is looking good so far, but without being resupplied we will soon run out and be forced into cannibalism. I’d have to open contact with other nations and ask for help until we can become self sustaining. One of the first things to be purchased from a neighboring nation would have to be greenhouse equipment and plant seeds.

- Open contact with a close-by nation and request supplies.

Third on the agenda, crops are growing nicely and we even have some surplus. So, we trade them to a small nation for extra building supplies and solar generators. With the supplies we get we’ll construct further living quarters and greenhouse facilities.

- Secure further building materials and power-sources.

Now, some of my citizens will be growing restless at this time, so the next thing to do would be to send the Achilles along the coast and send a few people inland to scout possible sites for mining various ores that can be traded or sold. we can only last on the dependency of others for so long, so one of the top priorities of mine would be to find a way to make my nation economically stable. Because Antarctica is a vast frozen tract of nothingness, the only way to be able to do that would be to dig.

- Locate possible minerals for extracting.

Its been a while now and the Achilles has since returned as well as a number of the scouting parties. There are a few sites that can provide limited mining, but on the whole little else. After a time, enough revenue can be acquired from these mineral deposits to allow for the construction of larger living facilities as well as a general store with the next supply shipment to arrive on the Achilles from its last journey from Chile.

- Construct general store and further living facilities, try to allow more room for the citizens to expect some measure of privacy.

Soon I find a piece of mail on my desk aboard the Avalon from the French government requesting to set up a long-term research outpost in my nation. Apparently the conditions they’re looking to study are localized within my borders. With this comes an idea, I’ll rent them the land and make available to them my facilities at a low price. With this comes the added revenue of whatever the researches buy at my general store.

- Rent land to foreign nation for research purposes.

Now I have a steady income and I can afford another building, this time well stocked with research equipment. And because of the location of my nation and my capitol on the tip of the Antarctic Peninsula, I am in a position which places New Atlantis at a near highway for researchers traveling to various outposts in Antarctica and I’m starting to see an economic growth as scientists and researchers stop off to reequip themselves and spend a few nights in a warm bed in one of my new hotels. With this influx of visitors I’m finding more immigrants arriving and my capitol is starting to expand.

- Begin building more commercial areas, start laying down a concrete road system.
- Construct a solar and wind generated power plant.

Next thing I find is that I am being advised to start collecting official taxes and begin providing public services.

- Found the first official police department, fire department, hospital, educational system and set up a tax collectors office.

As more ships arrive on a regular basis and with the Avalon now firmly iced in I have to find a way to keep the waterways clear. After contacting a foreign nation to purchase a surplus icebreaker, I’ll have to consult with my city engineers about building a port to properly receive new ships.

- Build a harbor to allow easier loading and unloading of supplies, equipment, and personnel as well as an airport.

Now as my capitol grows, settlers are migrating outwards along the coat and founding new cities and finally I am faced with the growing need to build a military force to counter the acts of piracy that we’ve been experiencing along the trade routs. Currently my only form of defense is the Avalon but it is still being used as the administrative facility for my government. Beside the port I commission the construction of a drydock as well as the design and construction of three medium sized destroyers and two new cruisers.

- Found a Navy

The new cruisers are given the names USNA Vostok and USNA Lafayette while the destroyers are given the names USNA Tesla, USNA Cousteau, and USNA Scotia. As the Vostok, Cousteau, and Tesla are patrolling the shipping lanes and the Lafayette and the Scotia are anchored outside the harbor, I decide its best to put the drydock to further use and commission the construction of two large research vessels named the NAR Discovery and the NAR Endeavour and send them to conduct research at the behest of my scientific advisers.

- Begin scientific research into arctic conditions.

As my nation grows further I find more issues start to arise, including establishing an embassy and lobbying for entry into the United Nations. Also I find the need to establish a standing army and a space program.

- Contact Heckler & Koch, purchase 50 G36E assault rifles and 50 H&K416 assault rifles for a 100 man army.
- Construct space facility and reusable space vehicles.

This is just some of what I would do should I found my own Antarctic nation, just talking about some of the ways I would get things started. What would you do with your nation?

Kind of scary when you think about it.

Link

70 Punished in Accidental B-52 Flight
By PAULINE JELINEK, Associated Press WriterFri Oct 19, 7:58 PM ET

The Air Force said Friday it would punish 70 airmen involved in the accidental, cross-country flight of a nuclear-armed B-52 bomber following an investigation that found widespread disregard for the rules on handling such munitions.

“There has been an erosion of adherence to weapons-handling standards at Minot Air Force Base and Barksdale Air Force Base,” said Maj. Gen. Richard Newton, the Air Force deputy chief of staff for operations.

Newton was announcing the results of a six-week probe into the Aug. 29-30 incident in which the B-52 was inadvertently armed with six nuclear-tipped cruise missiles and flown from Minot in North Dakota to Barksdale in Louisiana without anyone noticing the mistake for more than a day.

The missiles were supposed to be taken to Louisiana, but the warheads were supposed to have been removed beforehand.

A main reason for the error was that crews had decided not to follow a complex schedule under which the status of the missiles is tracked while they are disarmed, loaded, moved and so on, one official said on condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to speak on the record.

The airmen replaced the schedule with their own “informal” system, he said, though he didn’t say why they did that nor how long they had been doing it their own way.

“This was an unacceptable mistake and a clear deviation from our exacting standards,” Air Force Secretary Michael W. Wynne said at a Pentagon press conference with Newton. “We hold ourselves accountable to the American people and want to ensure proper corrective action has been taken.”

Newton acknowledged that the Air Force needs to “restore the confidence” lost among the American people after the August incident, which raised questions about the safety of the country’s nuclear arsenal.

“We are making all appropriate changes to ensure this has a minimal chance of ever happening again,” Wynne said.

Newton said the flight in question resulted from an “unprecedented string of procedural errors,” beginning with a failure by airmen to conduct a required inspection of the missiles before they were loaded aboard the B-52 bomber at Minot. The crew flying the plane was unaware nuclear warheads were on its wing, though it wasn’t explained what role they played in the mistake.

Highest among those to be punished are four officers who were relieved this week of their commands, including the 5th Bomb Wing commander at Minot — Col. Bruce Emig, who also has been the base commander since June.

In addition, the wing has been “decertified from its wartime mission,” Newton said.

Some 65 airmen have been decertified from handling nuclear weapons. The certification process looks at a person’s psychological profile, any medications they are taking and other factors in determining a person’s reliability to handle weapons.

After it was loaded with the missiles, the B-52 sat overnight at Minot, flew the next morning to Louisiana, and then sat on a tarmac again for hours before anyone noticed the nuclear warheads.

Newton avoided repeated questions on what extra security would have been required if crews had known the nuclear weapons were on the plane. But another official later said privately that security was increased as soon as the nuclear warheads were discovered.

The Air Combat Command ordered a command-wide stand-down — instituted base by base and completed Sept. 14 — to set aside time for personnel to review procedures, officials said.

The incident was so serious that it required President Bush and Defense Secretary Robert Gates to be quickly informed.

Wynne prefaced his remarks about the B-52 incident by saying that, in publicly confirming that nuclear weapons were involved, he had authorized a one-time exception to U.S. policy, which states that the location of nuclear weapons will never be confirmed publicly. He said he made this exception because of the seriousness of the episode and its importance to the nation.

The weapon involved was the Advanced Cruise Missile, a “stealth” weapon developed in the 1980s with the ability to evade detection by Soviet radar. The Air Force said in March that it had decided to retire the Advanced Cruise Missile fleet soon, and officials said after the breach that the missiles were being flown to Barksdale for decommissioning.

___

On the Net:

Air Combat Command: http://www.acc.af.mil

Have we had nuclear weapons for so long our military is becoming caviler in regards to their handling?

(To the tune of My Bonnie — Sing it!)

My Ron Paul is gaga for freedom
My Ron Paul loves liberty
My Ron Paul makes socialists jealous
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency!

Vote Ron
Vote Paul
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency, you see!
Vote Ron
vote Paul
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency

My Ron Paul hates deficit spending
My Ron Paul likes austerity
My Ron Paul won’t raise all your taxes
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency!

Vote Ron
Vote Paul
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency, you see!
Vote Ron
vote Paul
O Vote Ron Paul’s Presidency

we are petunias
no matter whether
i think i am not really a flower
you have nice smelling petals
Master of All
do I become a petunia
you say yes, become a petunia
and so i do, Master
i am a petunia
and we are
petunias
forever
thank you, Master.

The whole world is the kingdom of Visa

You must realize that the whole world is the kingdom of Visa as stated by Mastercard. Because I said so, that’s why. Any injustice will be punished by Customer Service and you need not worry about it. Your view of the debt limit is revenge but our CEO’s view of interest rates are to transform the blah blah blah blah blah…

Sorry, I lost steam. Here, let me start again:

The more definitively someone tells you they know what God is, the more desperate they are to nab your cash.

Fair? Unfair? True? Untrue?

I’ve been reading the diaries on IT for the past few months and find “it” somewhat intriguing and semi-addicting to see what others are thinking politically, environmentally and culturally. However, my oldest child (who is still in elementary school) recently asked me, “Mom, can you name the only two honest Presidents our country has ever had?” I thought I knew the answer until he proved me wrong. Then, it made me stop and think for a moment how important it was to a 9-year-old that I get the answer right. I didn’t want to fail him, and yet, I didn’t want to look stupid either. Parents are supposed to know everything, especially when it comes to being honest. Isn’t that what we teach our children? Our future leaders? Honesty is the best policy? Short of a complete answer, I asked him if I could mail him the answer! He thought that was funny and agreed! So, I would like to hear who you honestly think were the only two honest Presidents our country has ever had.

Weed causes forgetfulness… Yep, an entire generation forgot they smoked the stuff!

It may seem a little extreme to say that I’m embarrassed to be a member of the baby boomer generation. After all, we’re the biggest and most successful generation since that small bunch of ex-Englishfolk baled on the Not-So-Great British tax structure and declared that this was the future home of hippies and millionaires. But alas, I must admit it - I can’t stand shoulder to shoulder with my gen-mates and hold my head up next to a bunch of people who smoked enough marijuana to stone the current population of India, whilst they start pounding their sagging middle-aged chests and spouting off about how kids today shouldn’t even think of experimenting with drugs.

Let’s get this announcement straight: Who the hell are they kidding? What a bunch of dime-store hyocritical bastards. “Just say No????” - like any one of us ever even considered that option when we were riding that six story waterslide called puberty into our early twenties. We grabbed for all the gusto we could handle, and occasionally reaped the fruits of overindulgence, which more than likely resulted in waking up on some lawn wondering why the comfy, green bed came complete with the occasional dandelion.

I might be willing to tolerate the Partnership for a Drug Free America if they were as anxious to stop the people popping unnecessary - but legally prescribed - drugs as they are to put an end to the only thing the first twenty-five years of human life are good for - Pushing the envelope to the fullest while one is still young and resilient. I might also be more tolerant of the drug war if we actually napalmed the hell out of poppy and coca fields that were doing the supplying. But we don’t - we pay their governments to stop their farmer from doing the only thing that makes them money - and SURPRISE, it doesn’t work.

Take the ‘kids in the basement’ commercial. There they are, safe at home, engaged in nothing more notorious than playing video games, when one of the throng implores his friend to ‘break out some of that weed.” Our friend cracks open his wooden stash box only to find a note that says “We need to talk - Mom”. Let’s assume that the conversation isn’t going to be about Mom having pinched little Marvin’s stash so she could get high. This is about her child’s descent into the writhing hell of - mary-ju-wanna. Yipe. Call the Cops or The National Guard or maybe even President Bush, who, it has been reported, was into the nose candy, back in the day. Jeez, ma, the kids could be drinking and driving…

But, hey, let’s run screaming to make commercials against smoking dope.

If mere rhetoric isn’t enough, try the following simple list of annual causes of death in the United States�

Tobacco 435,000
Poor Diet and Physical Inactivity 400,000
Alcohol 85,000 / 101,653
Microbial Agents 75,000
Toxic Agents 55,000
Motor Vehicle Crashes 43,000 / 26,347
Adverse Reactions to Prescription Drugs 32,000
Suicide 30,622
Incidents Involving Firearms 29,000
Homicide 20,3084
Sexual Behaviors 20,000
All Illicit Drug Use, Direct and Indirect 17,000
Non-Steroidal Anti-Inflammatory Drugs Such As Aspirin 7,600
Marijuana 0

Yep. That’s right. Despite the valiant efforts of tokers from Baja to Bangor, NOBODY in the western hemisphere has gotten stoned to death since long before Shirley Jackson wrote “The Lottery” in 1948.

For the record, I am not a dope smoker - I did it when I was younger and it made me paranoid, an experience I don’t especially like, so I stopped. But that doesn’t mean that I am somehow now required to disavow the fact that often I had a very good time while high. Truth is, I am embarassed when anyone around my age starts blathering on about the ‘dangers’ of drugs�. After all, 100% of the people who tell you they did drugs (and you shouldn’t), managed to survive long enough to become hypocrites.

“We almost got killed back there!”
“No, honey. it was just a close call.”

This may change tomorrow, but right now Twister is my favorite bad movie. It’s full of doozies like this, either messed up by the writing or messed up by the delivery: “He’s not in it for the science. He’s in it for the money!”

What’s your favorite bad movie, and why?

Tonight I tried…

A splash of cranberry juice mixed with lime-flavored carbonated water: standard rice-cake yummy.

A splash of Midori melon liqueur mixed with lime-flavored carbonated water: oh yummy yum yum yum yum.

What’s your preferred form of liquid enjoyment?