Did God Practice Contraception?
Mother Davis considers the theological implications as she mentions,
The radical Pro-Life movement and the Catholic Church will be shocked, but evidence has just been found that God practiced contraception.
It seems that the evidence was right under the nose of activists in the Religious Right all along, right in the Bible.
In Genesis, chapter 20, verses 17-18, God is described as practicing contraception:
“God healed Abimelech, and his wife, and his maidservants; and they bare children. For the LORD had fast closed up all the wombs of the house of Abimelech”
How about that. God used some kind of divine medical technique to take Abimelech’s wife, and make her unable to conceive children, but only temporary, to suit God’s political purposes, and then changed his mind and undid the procedure and made Abimelech’s wife able to make babies again.
So, not only did God practice contraception, but he forced contraception on women - just like the Religious Right accusses Communist China of doing. Gosh. Was God a commie back in those days? The Leftist Lord. Hm.
I guess God wasn’t Pro-Life after all.
Getting ready to send the Pope a condom in the mail,
Mother Davis
Well, that’s one I haven’t heard before…
I don’t think any fundies would take this as a useful argument in favor of humans practicing contraception. The rules are different for gods.
In fact, they might claim that this is an argument against human contraception. As I understand it, the argument against contraception says that children are God’s gift, and it’s not up to humans to decide when to conceive; pointing out a case where God applied contraception just tells them that they’re right.
Of course, the notion that God decides the outcome of each sex act leads to the inevitable conclusion that he’s paying attention to each sex act, like some kind of omnipotent voyeur…
Don’t you ever blaspheme the name of my Lord like that by accusing Him of being a commie! Maybe you should read your Bible for real before you make accusations like that.
Or what Ande? What would you like to see happen to blasphemers? Shouldn’t God fight his own battles with us infidels, or does he need you to stand up for him? And I am not quite sure what you mean by reading for real, but I assume you mean that Mother Davis is unable to read and interpret things for herself, using her own mind, experience, thoughts and judgement; without one of Gods standins telling her how it really, really means something else thats quite nice and fits in with their orthodoxy. Well, I can assure you that Mother Davis to me seems quite able to come up with her own conclusions, and can come to different conclusions about the bible than you do; and can spot inconsistencies in that supposedly perfect text, and it is insulting to suggest that she can not.
Yeah, my Lord s a big guy, and he’ll beat you up if you criticize him. It’s called righteousness, see.