Although I’m relatively straight when it comes to sex, as a matter of curious interest and a desire to expand my mental horizons I’ve taken to listening to two podcasts lately: Polyamory Weekly, a regular audio broadcast about people who agree to share their romantic love with more than one person in their lives, and Swingercast, another regular audio broadcast about a couple who share their bodies with others in a community of the sexually free. I’ve learned from both of these podcasts that swinging and polyamory are definitely not synonymous. While Swingercast focuses most centrally upon acts of sex (with a lot of “and then I fucked her, and you were beside me getting fucked by him, and then you sucked her tits while she kissed me. She was really hot!”), Polyamory Weekly focuses on social-political issues generated by communities that diverge from the norm (leading to a fair amount of allegiance with gay, lesbian and bisexual interests and efforts), as well as relationship issues that pertain to pretty much all romantic alliances (such as jealousy, boredom, and commitment).
There’s a really interesting twist on this difference: although host Cunning Minx of Polyamory Weekly takes pains to state every week that “It’s Not All About Sex!”, it’s clear from the occasional (and mostly non-explicit) discussions of sex that do occur on Polyamory Weekly that the polyamorous bunch Minx rubs shoulders with can be pretty kinky: dominance/submission, bondage, rope play, and so on. On the other hand, while the Swingercast folks talk a whole lot (really, a whole lot!) about sex, the sex in which they engage doesn’t deviate much from the traditional tame Penthouse script: men engage with women, women engage with women (to many exhortations of “that was hot!”), but men never engage sexually with other men. Indeed, in one episode of Swingercast, folks were having cybersex with one another, and when two male avatars accidentally “touched” each other online, their avatars (not their actual bodies) jumped apart as speech bubbles exclaimed “Ewww!”
It takes all sorts to make an interesting world. But I think it’s particularly interesting that the more sexually adventurous Minx of Polyamory Weekly is interested most in talking about relationships, while the swingers who podcast are most focused on talking about wild sex, but a really pretty tame version of what wild sex could be.
