Joke Challenge: Democrats and Republicans

20 Responses to Joke Challenge: Democrats and Republicans

1. Speller says:

   11/16/2006 at 8:00 pm

   1 R, 1 P, 1 U, 1 B, 1 L, and 1 N.

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2. Carla says:

   11/16/2006 at 8:34 pm

   Answer: Why do you hate the troops?

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3. Peregrin Wood says:

   11/16/2006 at 9:19 pm

   Democrats cut and run.
   Republicans lose.

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4. Jim says:

   11/17/2006 at 5:54 pm

   The same as the difference between a fox a and a chicken.

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5. Luke says:

   11/17/2006 at 6:08 pm

   A republican works at McDonalds and wants to be Donald trump; A democrat works at a coop and wants to be George Soros.

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6. CPA says:

   11/15/2007 at 12:36 am

   Dictatorship vs democratic republic.
   Rule of privilege vs rule of law.
   “Opposite Day” vs “Groundhog Day”.
   Paternalism vs Individualism.
   Greed vs sharing.
   Intolerance vs tolerance.
   Creation myth vs scientific pursuit of knowledge.
   Deceit vs discourse.
   Dogma vs reason.
   Alleged direct line to a deity vs acceptance of divine wisdom.
   Trust me vs when you’ve earned my trust!
   Ignorance vs answer #2 by Carla – who “gets it”!

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7. Cheryl says:

   12/14/2007 at 1:46 pm

   Republicans shout their stance on a position over and over to drown out the democrats who speak in a normal tone when explaining their position and the reasoning that got them there.

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8. Ogden says:

   12/19/2007 at 10:24 pm

   Gosh, I thought political thought was a spectrum, not a dichotomy. Anyway, gotta go, I have to get back to alienating people by prejudging them.

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9. Ferdinandi says:

   12/19/2007 at 11:30 pm

   You fail, Ogden. Not funny. Purity must take a pause every now and then for some humor.

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10. jeff says:

    1/9/2008 at 6:50 pm

    republicans are people who were once democrats while young, but now work for a living.

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11. Jim says:

    1/9/2008 at 7:01 pm

    Republicans are people who assert that more than half of voting Americans don’t work for a living, then wonder why more than half of voting America looks askance in their direction.

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12. Vynce says:

    1/9/2008 at 7:20 pm

    a republican dreams of being rich, a democrat worries about being poor.

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13. J. Clifford says:

    1/9/2008 at 9:22 pm

    Republicans are people who once worked for a living, but are now busy pretending that they’re young.

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14. Vincet says:

    3/2/2009 at 12:35 pm

    Both parties share the same devotion to maintaining a large impoverished population. The Republicans want the cheap labor, and the Democrats want the votes.

    Democrats are for tax and spend while Republicans are for tax and give away.

    Spending will sometimes grow the economy and thus reduce the deficit, but giving away to foreigners, the rich and the military always causes implosion of the economy.

    Republicans reduce everything to 4 talking points: Fear, Hate, Ignorance, and Greed. And yes, several of these are related.

    Republicans may call themselves the party of Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt, but the Democratic party shares the political and social legacy of these great Republican presidents. And no! Reagan was not a good president. He was as dumb and conniving as George W. Bush, only he did not have a Republican congress to allow him to get into an endless war or totally sabotage the American economy.
    All politicians play loose with the truth, but to Republicans lying is considered a positive character asset.

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15. ron from Texas says:

    8/11/2009 at 8:41 pm

    Jeff beat me to it. A republican is a person who was democrat when they were young and supported by mommy and daddy. When they grew up and had to earn their own money, they became republlican.

    Republicans want things to stay the same. Democrats want things to change as long as they get to say what happens.

    Conservatives are for limited govt involvement and low taxes, which does stimulate the economy (this cannot be denied no matter how many times someone says the opposite.) Liberals want to tax (take money away from the earners) and spend (give it away to others for no particular reason) and more importantly, want to keep it for themselves, just as badly as conservatives do. Difference is, conservatives get their money through working and liberals get their money through the force of government, aka, armed robbery.

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    • Jim says:

      8/11/2009 at 8:47 pm

      Well I say Republicans are Democrats who grew horns and wings and started eating babies. Doesn’t make it true. Do you have any evidence to back up your conjecture?

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16. Freedom 4 says:

    10/15/2009 at 5:04 pm

    The Difference Between Conservatives and Liberals:

    Conservatives do chrity and help their neighbor,

    Liberals demand that the republicans be stripped of their money, the government waste a portion of it, and then the rest be given what ever cause the democrats pretend to actually care about.

    If conservative dos not like guns, they do not buy them.

    If a Liberal does not like guns they think that they should be taken from everyone no matter what the constitution says.

    If a conservative is gay they live a happy gay life.

    If a liberal is gay, they try judicially forcing you to accept it, and force it on your children as well.

    If a Conservative is down on their luck they thing

    If a conservative wants to support the American worker they buy American made products.

    If a liberal wants to support the Americann worker, they force employers to pay them wages far above the market value, which they cann not a fford because Liberals refuse to pay those prices and buy all foreign cars and goods.

    If a conservative wants to encourage success in society, they congratulate those that are successful and allow them to reap the rewards of their success while providing jobs to others and everyone with a product or service that makes their lives better.

    If a Lliberal wants to encourage success, they hate the successful, bash them constantly, demmand that theya re stripped from everything they earn, but yet still demand the products and services providded by the successful, and then give what they stole from the successful to those that have no desire to work to be successful and are incentivised to be unsuccessful.

    If a conservative wants a house, they get a job, work hard, and buy a house.

    If a liberal w ants a house, they demand that the money be taken from the conservative
    because they have a house and it is not fair that they do not even though they will nto get a job and earn it as they are physically able to do.

    Conservatives believe that the parents should be able to determine what is best for their child

    Democrats believe that someone that lives in another state far far away that wants to endoctrinate your children better knows what is right for your child.

    Conservatives believe in people and know that anyone can succede if they just work for it.

    Liberals think that anyone that works hard and is successful is only so because they are exploitative and are holding down everyone else, so they should be stripped of all of their success.

    Conservaitves believe in equal rights and treatment for all (no exceptions)

    Liberals believe that people should be treated differnnetly and have different rights based on their politicall afiliation, race, socioeconomical background, sex, sexual preference, and their lack of work ethic.

    Conservatives love children from conception and for the rest of their lives.

    Liberals believe that children should be destroyed before they have a chance to speak for themselves because they are bad for the environment and demand responsibility for actions, and if they are born that they should be punished for being born by being burried with debt used to pay for able bodied people to play video games instead of working.

    Conservative believe that people should be able to have guns to protect themselves.

    Liberals believe that the guns are much better in the hands of criminals only.

    A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person. The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican’s pocket and got out twenty dollars. He kept $15 for administrative fees and gave the homeless person five. Now you understand the difference between Republicans & Democrats.

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    • Jim says:

      10/15/2009 at 7:03 pm

      That was the best joke I’ve read in a long time!

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      • qs says:

        10/15/2009 at 9:02 pm

        best joke

        As funny as Karl Rove rapping?

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17. JD says:

    10/15/2009 at 9:38 pm

    There’s a differece?

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