In a suburb of Detroit, Glenn Johnson managed to cross his backyard above-ground swimming pool in just 2.53 seconds, a personal record.
In Kirkland, Washington, Dale Yupree walked to her neighborhood grocery store in just 16 minutes, although she was slowed down when she felt obliged to stop to talk with that strange man at 29 Plum Street.
In Yuma, Arizona, Jackson Rorsch vaulted over a six foot-high fence in order to avoid being spotted by his girlfriend’s father.
In West Memphis, Tennessee, Richard Larsen tossed a lampshade 23 feet into the air in order to get a frisbee out of a sweetgum tree, but his move was disqualified when the lampshade got stuck in the tree.
In Council Bluffs, Iowa, Seth Fobray finally managed to reach the faucet all by himself. He is the youngest of the Fobray family ever to do so.
All of these achievements have at least as much impact on your life as the Olympics in China, if not more.
Um, what’s your point?
That the olympics are irrelevant. Duh.