1. Uses 14 colors on a black background
2. Includes an encrypted file with two-word country code “ru” in the name and a three-letter file extension you’ve never seen before
3. 1200 pixel-tall header graphic of a rug
4. Converts the words “and” “or” and “the” to animated smiley graphics
5. 16 widgets, pre-installed in folder extra>language>mandarin>misc>misc>language>mandarin>empty
6. CSS file size larger than Madonna Like a Prayer mp3 dance mix
7. Footer contains links to free Oxycodone prescriptions
8. 6 Columns
9. Picture of a cat, anywhere
