USA Today Publishes the Two Most Useless Advice Columns Ever

November 29th, 2012 | Posted by Jim Cook in Economy | Environment | Media

Following up on a similar article by Rick Jervis and William M. Welch printed on page 3 of its national newspaper, USA Today published another advice column by John Waggoner, sharing tips with members of the public on what they should do if they win the regularly-scheduled government gambling scam called the “Powerball Lottery.” Take an annuity or a lump sum? Hire a lawyer? Use a spokesperson? Evade taxes?

That advice is useful for only 1 out of 175 million people who buy Powerball Lottery tickets. Given that only 3.8 million Americans read any USA Today article on a given day, the chances are if any person at all won the Powerball Lottery ticket, they didn’t read the USA Today advice columns. That makes these the most useless advice columns ever.

USA spent 24 square inches of its daily newspaper on just one of these useless advice columns, space that could have been taken up by some other news that is actually relevant to Americans. Mercury poisoning from cement plants in the United States kills between 1,000 and 2,500 Americans every year — and damages the brains and vital organs of many more.

How many square inches of its newspaper did USA Today dedicate to the problem of mercury poisoning today? None.
How many square inches did USA Today dedicate to the problem this week? None.
How many square inches did USA Today dedicate to the problem this month? You know the answer: none.

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