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This morning, we got ourselves a little note from one “popjockster”:

no one wants you here go shit your self obama sucks

The lovely thing about this message is that it has absolutely no capitalization or punctuation. That means we all can supply our own. I prefer to read it as: “No one wants. You, here, go? Shit! Your self: Obama. Sucks…”

Oh, the existentialism of it all. Yes, being the most powerful man in the world can suck sometimes. The paper cuts that come from signing all those forms, for example, are particularly irksome. But I persevere. My secret? The all-new latex SecretaryGlove(tm) from ConCo!

Don’t worry, popjockster. We aren’t going anywhere. Kisses.

Robert Laity of western New York writes in with this essay on our president-elect:

Obama’s a derelict

Robert’s been a busy bee around the internet posting this observation.

Buffalo Topix:

Barack is a derelict and now he’s “Present” Obama.Armadinijahed Loves him.

MSNBC:

Obama is a derelict who advocates letting survivors of the “Holocaust” of abortion die in the abortion clinic,on their own,without medical intervention.

Newsvine:

Obama “honest”, no. Obama honorable,no. Obama a derelict,yes.

I’m trying to figure out what it could mean for Barack Obama to be a “derelict.” Is he a ship floating on the water, abandoned by his captain? Is he a spot of high land bereft of well water? Is he homeless?

I personally prefer the ship option, because it keeps open the possibility that Barack Obama might contain a bottle of rum, or perhaps some doubloons.

William B. sent us the most charming little love note last night:

You people and your website are sorry sacks of shit. Please pack up your shit and move to another country before you attempt to take my guns and I’m forced to retaliate.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I’m very concerned. You see, William, in your second sentence you tell us to “pack up our shit,” but in the first sentence you very clearly indicate not only that our shit is already in sacks, but that we are the shit, already packed, that we should pack up. Can shit pack itself? Does it have opposable thumbs? These are thematic cesspools into which you wade, William B., without any clear indication of a path out.

Who’s taking William B’s guns? Was it you, Peregrin? If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times: we don’t touch other people’s guns, young man! We hire the hobgoblins and elves to do it.

Sstar4353 sends us this little love note today:

YOUR WEBSITE IS HORRIBLE!!!!

THE MOST UN-AMERICAN WEBSITE I HAVE EVER SEEN!!! PROBABLY MUSLIM OR ALQUAEDA RUN, ISN’T IT!!! YOU WILL ALL REGRET BACKING UP OBAMA!!! PART OF ME HOPES OBAMA GETS INTO OFFICE, SO ALL OF YOU WILL BE ANNIHIALATED!!!! HE IS THE ANTI-CHRIST, CAN’T YOU SEE THAT?
NO, YOU ARE ALL JUST LIKE THE RATS FOLLOWING THE PIED PIPER, OFF TO THEIR OWN DISTRUCTION!!!!

THIS IS A WOMAN, A NURSE, A MOTHER AND A GRANDMOTHER VERY MUCH FOR MCCAIN/PALIN!!!

The following is just a small sample of the hate mail we’ve received after posting a video with information about Sarah Palin’s extremist religious beliefs. These are the kind of people who support Sarah Palin:

“God is going to send anyone to hell who votes for a Democrat.”

“God has a plan for Alaska and every other location on earth. God has a plan for the maker of this video too. Pray for the guy.”

“Go Palin your awesome and very intelligent!! the kooky liberals are otherwise…they are simply clueless and hate America…they should be sent to IRan and China to live!! ha ha ha ha !!!
Go America…go McCain/Palin go US ARmy and the Commander in cheif…GW Bush !!! Hooah !!!”

“Hey stupid…the world is going to come to an end…it willnot however be destroyed…so your stupid ignorant ass better be ready !!! ha ha ha ha !! read your bible…Gods wordrules…not your stupid liberal brain!!”

“Fuckin Liberal scum. I am going to go back to my talk radio. Thanks fuck nuts for wasting my conservitive time. Ohh and hey one last thing you mental illness fuck. I hope someone is not pc to you tommarrow and hurts your little lIBERAL fEELINGS.”

“your WAY out of line..repent!”

“The Democratic party is a FAG party, preaching the promotion of sodomite marriage, butchering unborn children, etc.”

“We deserve to be damned if we elect Obama!”

The following is my favorite, and I do wish that Sarah Palin’s supporters would follow this example:

“personally I decided a few years ago I wouldnt vote again. that is my choice. I believe the lord will usher in whom he wants.”

Yes, if God really does have a plan for the USA, and determines who will become President, there’s no reason for you to vote, is there? Demonstrate submission to the will of God, Palin supporters, and stay home on Election Day. Please.

In reaction to Jim’s article about Ralph Nader defending the Bill of Rights yesterday, a Republican blogger from Ohio calls Irregular Times a “liberal kook website”.

Who’s the kook? This same blogger calls Ralph Nader a “car safety nazi”.

A car safety nazi? Pardon, but was Adolph Hitler known for imposing car safety regulations? Was that the trouble with Nazi Germany?

Only a right wing kook could equate a concern for automotive safety with the horrors of Auschwitz.

The truth is that all human beings are kooky in some way. As for myself, I’d rather be a liberal kook, supporting freedom and equality for all human beings, than a right wing kook who thinks that the Nazi holocaust was equivalent to a citizen campaign for better safety belts.

A few days ago, I placed the following video online, so that people could see the bizarre ideas being promoted by Sarah Palin’s church in Wasilla. This is the church at which Palin gave a speech on June 8th this year, proclaiming that the fighting and killing of American soldiers in Iraq is a part of God’s will, and a fossil fuel pipeline in Alaska is too.

In response to the video a supporter of Sarah Palin wrote,

“Fuck you heathen, I bet you can see Hell creeping up on your life already, can’t you?”

Every time I see journalists refer to people like this as “values voters”, I feel the urge to vomit.

Republicans have gotten into a bit of a rut when it comes to their attacks against Democratic presidential candidates. With Bill Clinton, Al Gore and John Kerry, it was all about Vietnam - that they should have been there, or if they were in Vietnam, they were lily-livered cowards.

In 2008, they’re at it again, against Barack Obama. We got the following comment yesterday:

“John McCain suffered the tortures of the damned for his love of country, while Obama was doing lines of coke and making friends with terrorist scumbags like William Ayers and that Charles Manson groupie he is married to.”

I want to provide this newsflash to the Republican Party: The Sixties ended almost forty years ago now. Most Americans alive today were children, or not even born yet, during that time.

That includes Barack Obama, who was fourteen years old when the Vietnam War ended. Sorry, Republicans, but you can’t pull that nonsense about how Barack Obama should have gone to Vietnam. Barack Obama did exactly what he should have done during the Vietnam War - he went to elementary school and middle school.

The following piece of hate mail was left in response to one of our videos from an opponent of Barack Obama who is downright furious at Barack Obama’s success in yesterday’s primary elections:

now i know where obama got all his votes . plenty of dumb people like u i ll be back to wipe your tears come nov, it will be mcain by a landslide . barak is unelectable,morans

Gee, thanks for the tip. I’ll tell all the other “morans” I know that “Barak” Obama is unelectable. Do you think that will affect their choice of who to vote for?

Today’s charming love comes from Robert J. Lee of Norman, Oklahoma:

Why is everything Bush’s fault? Are you that short of ideas? The answer is obvious. How could Bush cause all of the things that you proclaim and still be such an ineffective President? Take responsibility for your own life. You are probably bitter because you have an A.R.M. Interest only loan and can’t make payments. And now you want someone to bail you out.

Gee. Actually, I rent.

But, golly, you’re right. We never ever ever ever suggest ways that people take responsibility for themselves and the world around them. We’re all just waiting for Lenin to give us more of that yummy yeasty chleb. Hail, Lenin! Say, has anyone seen Lenin around lately?

Notice the sweet-n-cuddly use of the straw man. See, if we buy into the extreme and off-kilter depiction of what we say — that George W. Bush is at fault for everything — then all Robert has to do is identify one thing that’s not Bush’s fault and all of a sudden his Best President Evah is off the hook. But I’m not hurt. Actually, I’m touched. I think this is Robert’s romantic opening, kind of like how middle schoolers tease the kid they secretly have a crush on. Sorry, Robert, I’m taken. But I’m honored you would think of me that way.

Yawn, stretch. What a beautiful snowy day. Coffee, coffee. And my my, what do we have here in our pretty pretty mailbox?

Still killing innocent babies still in the mother’s womb? You are beyond dispicable….. Conservatives don’t judge you. Someone much higher will though……Good day

Well golly and crackers, what a fun roller coaster ride for so early in the morning. First he finds out about my deeply held secret, my precious baby-killing X-ray eyes. Oh dear, now I shall have to seek him out and perform my special x-ray memorectomy upon him. Then there’s the insult, then the refrain from judgment, then the threat from the fictional magic deity, then the fond fare-me-well. Thankee thankee, you anonymous love mailer. You’ve worked out all the kinks in my neck!

Our latest piece of love mail was a real gem:

This is not a free country, because of “progressives” like you, it’s a socialist country. And because of “progressive” fools like you, it will become more socialist and unfree by the day, right up to the concentration camps, and the wholesale genocide of millions who refuse to submit, ala other “progressives” such as Stalin. Thanks for your work towards that result…

Wow. I had no idea we were so dangerous. Suddenly I feel like slapping on a leather jacket and doing the jackboot about the room.

Curses! Just when I had lined up a squad of brownshirts to begin my rise to the top of a socialist autocracy, this insightful correspondent exposes our grand plan:

It seems you’re not happy unless everyone is thinking and behaving and hating just like you. This is typical of “progressives”. I suspect that if you had the power, you would use naked force to enact your policies; individuals be damned as to whether they like it or not. Anyone who dared to stop bleating to your tune of “progressive” (read socialist, communist, fascist) “hipness” would be a pariah and would be sent to the gulag, or shot…

He’s onto us! Now we’ll have to delay our takeover of the stock exchange by at least six months. Someone tell Gloria Steinem to idehay the enadesgray.

Ah. A new year, bringing the new love mail. This comes from Richard Colwell:

Where are all the victims? Where are the photographs (from Al Jazeera, perhaps?) of the thousands and thousands tortured and put to genocide by your buddy Saddam? Where is your catalog of photos from the genocide in Sudan (probably not here because it’s muslims running that extermination campaign too)? How about the victims who HAD THEIR HEADS CUT OFF? Why no photographs of those killed in the Spain train bombing (muslims yet AGAIN, would be my guess)? I also find it interesting that you omit to give credit where credit is due - how many of these civilians have been hurt as a result of muslim made terrorist bombs? My guess is most of them.

You couldn’t care less about these people; you aren’t asking for some form of help for them, you are USING them as an emotional marketing piece for you to gain sympathy for your cause, which is either touchy feely pacifism or pro-muslim terrorism.

Have a nice day, al jazeera terrorist.

All of the images on the page Richard Colwell refers to are from the first two weeks of the U.S. invasion of Iraq, when there was no “muslim made terrorist bomb” insurgency in Iraq.

As for images of people killed by Saddam Hussein and people killed by Islamic terrorists: they’ve been provided in plenty (albeit pixilated in the case of decaptiations) to the American people by the likes of CNN and FOX News. But major American media outlets didn’t show these pictures. That’s one reason I showed them. The other reason I showed them is that our government inflicted them thanks to George W. Bush and Republican politicians and Democratic politicians who really should have known better (yes, Senator Clinton, I mean you too) and a population of civilian sheep who were in a rip-roaring mood to run around waving flags and sporting t-shirts with choice phrases like “FUQ IRAK”, just in a jolly jolly mood about starting a war of choice. All the people, from George W. Bush on down, who pumped their fists and said “I feel good!” on the eve of war should be willing to look at these pictures and think about them.

And that “al jazeera terrorist” remark? It’s so spring 2003. Richard, Richard, Richard. Tune in to FOX to get the new, hip put downs. You could give me a middle name of “Hussein,” for instance. It’s those little efforts that show you really care.