Irregular Dictionary

Per Se: A phrase used by politicians to signal to supporters that they’re about to break a promise. Example: “The issue of the phone companies per se is not one that overrides the security of the American people.” – Barack Obama, June 2008

Posted in Barack Obama, Election 2008, Irregular Dictionary, Legislation, Liberty, Politics | Tagged Barack Obama, democrat, dishonesty, fisa amendments act, h.r. 6304, per se, spying, warrantless wiretapping | 2 Comments

Pluto is a Zipthwat

F. G. Fitzer 6/13/2008

[0] comments

You could say, “Hey, they discovered a new zipthwat today!” Your friend would respond, “What’s a zipthwat?” You could respond with “A zipthwat is that group of big objects in the solar system like Pluto that are no longer classified as planets.” Your friend would not respond to that with, “Yeah, but what are they?” Your friend would say, “Oh, cool. Zipthwats.” He would then go call the woman he wanted to date and ask her if she wanted to come over so they could talk about zipthwats.

Posted in Irregular Dictionary, Science | Tagged astronomers, astronomy, definition, planet, pluto, plutoid, words, zipthwat | Leave a comment

Kempthorne Says Global Warming Policy Is Abuse

Peregrin Wood 5/15/2008

[3] comments

http://irregulartimes.com/peregrinwood.jpg

It is the intended purpose of the Endangered Species Act to trigger the creation of government policies that remove environmental threats that contribute to species extinction. Given that it’s global warming that threatens the extinction of polar bears, the creation of global warming policy is exactly what the listing of polar bears under the Endangered Species Act ought to result in.

Posted in Environment, Irregular Dictionary, Uncategorized | Tagged abuse, dirk kempthorne, endangered species act, global warming, interior, law, polar bears | 3 Comments

Name Your Favorite Homonaught

Jim Cook 12/3/2007

[8] comments

A homonaught is a word that is not itself naughty, but sounds like it really somehow ought to be naughty. This might have to do with the etymology of the word, or the sound of the word, or some other …

Posted in Irregular Dictionary | 8 Comments

A New Definition of Religion

F. G. Fitzer 11/19/2007

[1] comment

A new definition for the Irregular Dictionary: Religion is the collection of a culture’s idiosyncrasies, put into writing, with buildings.

Posted in Irregular Dictionary, Religion | 1 Comment

How Do You Define Environmentalism?

The Green Man 4/22/2007

[8] comments

http://rdr.zazzle.com/img/imt-prd/pd-128913661804273310/isz-m/tl-Bumper+Sticker+Definition+of+Environmentalism.jpg

Don’t accept kooky right wing associations between environmentalism, Lenin, and Harry Potter. Express your own definition of environmentalism here.

Posted in Bumper Stickers, Environment, Irregular Dictionary | 8 Comments

Hillary Can Play The Fool, Strategist Suggests

F. G. Fitzer 1/15/2007

[0] comments

Democratic strategist Hank Sheinkopf has a plan for how Hillary Clinton can win the Democratic presidential nomination for the 2008 election. “She can say, like all the others can say, that she was fooled by the president,” he suggests. Yes, …

Posted in Democrats, Election 2008, George W. Bush, Irregular Dictionary, War and Peace | Tagged bizarre | Leave a comment

Swift Boat Attacks Jump The Shark

jclifford 11/15/2006

[2] comments

It’s not a swift boat attack to note that, time and time again, both Hoyer and Murtha have betrayed Democratic voters in favor of a right wing agenda and for the sake of their personal power.

Posted in Democrats, Election 2004, Irregular Dictionary | Tagged bizarre | 2 Comments

Under Bush, Six Years of Unending Emergency, Literally

jclifford 9/6/2006

[2] comments

If we really expand the meaning of the word emergency to include a six year-long period of time during which the supposed threat results in no deaths, no injuries, and no property damage on American soil, then it becomes possible to say that we will be in a state of emergency forever, because it is always possible that someone, somewhere, might be planning a spectacular attack.

Posted in George W. Bush, Homeland Insecurity, Irregular Dictionary | Tagged bizarre | 2 Comments

How to spot a deranged lunatic

F. G. Fitzer 8/11/2006

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There’s a deranged lunatic down at the coffee shop. He looked normal, but then I heard him order a latte! I think he voted for Ned Lamont – we must protect the children!

Posted in Irregular Dictionary | Tagged bizarre | Leave a comment

Re-defining Right Wing As Moderate

jclifford 5/30/2006

[2] comments

I’m coming to the conclusion that “moderate” and “centrist” are terms that have no real meaning. After all, if “moderate” includes support for a making flag burning a criminal act, then what do we call right wing? Shooting flag burners? The more I hear people try to use the terms “moderate” and “centrist” to describe their particular political opinions, the more I wish we could throw these terms into the trashbin of the English language.

Posted in Democrats, Election 2006, Irregular Dictionary, Irregular Ideas, Media, Politics | Tagged bizarre | 2 Comments

Keep America Secure. Keep America Gruntled.

F. G. Fitzer 4/20/2006

[2] comments

We need government initiatives to encourage gruntlement and prevent disgruntlement. Why, just think about the benefits widespread gruntlement could bring. There is no more productive citizen than a gruntled citizen.

Posted in Homeland Insecurity, Irregular Dictionary, Mysteries | Tagged bizarre | 2 Comments

Irregular Dictionary: Isthmus

Jim Cook 12/30/2005

[0] comments

Isthmus n (Divided Family American; late 20th century) 1 Narrow strip of land connecting two larger bodies of land 2 Holiday celebrated by your birth family after visiting your spouse’s birth family for Christmas and before visiting your local bar …

Posted in Humor and Fun, Irregular Dictionary, Religion | Leave a comment