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Quaking in Our Boots!

We who write for Irregular Times are not so rigid in our thinking that we aren't open to changing our minds in the face of a well-articulated argument. We also firmly believe making speech free for everyone, including those who disagree with us. We've set up a bulletin board called Irregular Retorts to provide a forum for the slinging of retorts. We only ask that these retorts be smart retorts.

Unfortunately, a majority of the retorts we get are just plain stupid. What makes for a stupid retort? Personal insults unrelated to the argument at hand are easy, cheap, irrelevant and boring. A lack of logic is nonsense. Unsubstantiated claims are worth nothing more than the missing support that doesn't prop them up.

In this last category we find apologists for "scientific creationism." A representative contribution of the scientific creationists to Irregular Retorts is the following quotation, supplied by an individual who calls him or herself "Oicu":

"There is less probability of a single cell arising through chance than there is of a tornado blowing through a junkyard and assembling a boeing 747."
Wow! what a zinger of a quote! This humdinger, we quickly determined, comes from the pen of "Dr. Kent Hovind." "Dr. Hovind" is affiliated with Creation Science Evangelism and "Fill the Void Ministries." "Dr. Hovind" includes this quote in a ringing essay entitled Are You Being Brainwashed By Your Public School Science Textbooks?.

Unfortunately, "Dr. Hovind" omitted evidence supporting this claim, and did not bother to give a citation to some source of evidence in this direction, either. In this regard, "Dr. Hovind" is violating principles of science he himself remarks upon in the same essay: "In order for something to be truly scientific in the strict sense of the word, it must be observable, testable, and demonstrable." "Dr. Hovind" satisfies none of these criteria with his own truth claim.

Well, we ought to give "Dr. Hovind" the benefit of the doubt, oughtn't we? After all, Kent Hovind is a "Dr.", which must indicate some sort of scientific expertise, mustn't it? He is a "Dr.," isn't he?

Maybe not. Poking around "Dr. Kent Hovind"'s website, I quickly discovered that his reported doctorate is in education, and not in scientific research. How did he use his education degree to generate this scientific insight?

Poking further, I found multiple references to the bogus degree of "Dr." Hovind. It turns out "Dr. Hovind" doesn't really even have an accredited degree at all! Brett Vickers offers some illumination of the mystery: "Hovind claims to possess a masters degree and a doctorate in education from Patriot University in Colorado. According to Hovind, his 250-page dissertation was on the topic of the dangers of teaching evolution in the public schools. Formerly affiliated with Hilltop Baptist Church in Colorado Springs, Colorado, Patriot University is accredited only by the American Accrediting Association of Theological Institutions, an accreditation mill that provides accreditation for a $100 charge. Patriot University has moved to Alamosa, Colorado and continues to offer correspondence courses for $15 to $32 per credit. The school's catalog contains course descriptions but no listing of the school's faculty or their credentials. Name it and Frame It lists Patriot University as a degree mill."

But hey, maybe Vickers is just being a meanie. So I visited Patriot University's website. Their "graduate course description" includes 7 courses on the Old Testament, 9 courses on the New Testament, 5 courses on Theology, 2 courses on Biblical Languages, 2 courses on Pastoral Ministries, 6 courses on Christian Counseling, and 2 courses on English. Only 4 courses are offered under the heading of "Education," with one of those being a set of audio tapes about the "Christian World View." Only 4 courses are offered on "Science and History", of which only 1 course purports to relate to science, and that is the "Biblical Basis of Modern Science".

This means that Hovind could at maximum have have taken only three courses on education and one course on science as seen through the Bible. All this was at an unaccredited university.

...but regardless of accreditation, couldn't "Patriot University" still offer a high-quality education?

Take a gander at the following high-level educational reading and homework from one of the classes at "Patriot University" and judge for yourself:

Now that's quality education!

With all this in mind, it is clear that when "Dr." Hovind says that "There is less probability of a single cell arising through chance than there is of a tornado blowing through a junkyard and assembling a boeing 747", he must be right!

Please, no more of your "evidence"! We just can't take it anymore!

We perverse evolutionists are quaking in our boots!

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