Subscribe to Irregular Times via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to Irregular Times and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 840 other subscribers

Invaluable Advice from our Civic Leaders

Ah, yes. Thank you, town elders. I have to admit I’ve made the mistake myself. In my foolish youth I often smoked cigarettes while lying down. No, I say to America’s youth, no longer. This practice shall not continue for another generation! The coals and ash will only fall in your eyes! Sit up […]

Top 5 Ways To Make a Killer First Impression

5. While shaking hands, stare into the other person’s eyes with intense focus, while darting your tongue out of the corner of your mouth every 5 seconds.

4. Interrupt conversations periodically by turning your head, looking up and to the left, saying, “Stop it, mother! Why can’t you just let me be myself?”

3. Get […]

Rally Talk: Some Great Aides!

Overheard in line for the McCain-Palin rally here in Columbus, Ohio (110 minutes until doors open and twelve people are in line… Quel enthusiasm):

“I don’t know who they have advising her, but whoever it is, they really need to give her some new advice. I’m sure if she becomes President she’ll be surrounded with […]