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Evangelical Christians Say They Can’t Worship Jesus Without New Government-Issued Religious Icons

Two years ago, Florida Tea Party activists were working themselves up into conniptions with the belief that “United States Postal Service—- Has Taken Lord Jesus Christ and Merry Christmas………………………………..OUT OF CHRISTMAS.” The Tea Partiers were spreading an idea that had become viral among the members of the gullible community nationwide: There were going to be […]

Exhibit A in the Commodification of the Holiday Season

When I was a lad, we celebrated the holiday season by holding hands and singing carols about togetherness. We were sure to be good little children, to do exactly what our parents told us. We knew the real meaning of the season, all right. The songs helped us remember: “you better watch out, you better […]

Christmas Emoticons for the Whole Family

¯¯\____(ツ)____/¯¯ What to get the Tetrarch who has everything. X * *** ***o* \ / ***o*** \ / (X╭╮X) *****o*** (-╭╮-) Uncle Bill and Uncle Ted still won’t talk to each other. **O*****o** **o****O***o* *******o**o**** **O**o********O** ******o**O*****o*** ! ! ____!_!____ \_________/ ____ | | _|__|_ (..) () Snowman tried liposuction against advice. ( ) >}:-)____? […]

American Family Association Hates Christmas 524 times as much as Barnes and Noble does

The American Family Association is at it again, whipping up its latest sales pitch religious objection to various companies around America that it says “hate Christ” and are part of a “War on Christmas”:

“With the goal of keeping Christ in Christmas, AFA has reviewed the websites, media advertising and in-store signage of the top […]

The American Family Association Hates Christmas: See the Proof!

The American Family Association, a media company that uses Christian branding to sell its products a fundamentalist Christian organization, has declared a boycott against PetSmart this holiday season. Why?

“AFA is calling for a limited one-month boycott of PetSmart over the company’s censorship of the word “Christmas.” For years, PetSmart has refused to use the […]

American Family Association Demands To See More Women In Skimpy Underwear With Christmas Themes

Victoria’s Secret heavily promotes Christmas, but the men at the American Family Association want to see more women in skimpy outfits with Christmas themes. Why don’t they just ask nicely, rather than blabbering on about a “War On Christmas”? […]

American Family Association Declares War on PetSmart: Saying “Christmas” 4,220 times is not enough

The Christian fundamentalist group calling itself the “American Family Association” is at it again:

“AFA is calling for a limited one-month boycott of PetSmart over the company’s censorship of the word “Christmas.” For years, PetSmart has refused to use the word Christmas on its website…

Let’s hold it right there; we can test this simply […]

Pope Francis Identifies God’s Specific Physical Qualities

In a remarkable reversal, the leader of the Roman Catholic Church has declared that the Christian god is not omnipotent after all. Rather, it seems that God can only move so fast.

Specifically, God is only capable of moving at the pace of 700 million miles per hour – no faster, and no slower than […]

Florida Tea Party Candidate Promotes Postage Stamp Conspiracy Theory

Karl Balone could have met the baby Jesus simply by taking a short trip to his local post office himself, but like most Tea Party members, he wouldn’t take the trouble to do a little fact checking. […]

The Bible And Jesus Are Waging A War On Christmas!

A wave of Christmas-hating degeneracy is sweeping over the world, and the American Family Association is documenting it. Jim has pointed out the AFA’s clear standard: If you don’t say Christmas, you’re a Christmas hater.

I know that the good Christian soldiers already have a lot of work on their agenda, given all the hateful […]

PROOF that the American Family Association is Against Christmas

Yesterday I learned that the American Family Association has targeted certain corporations for being “Against Christmas.” Apparently, you’re “Marginal on Christmas” if you’re a corporation that “refers to Christmas infrequently, or in a single advertising medium, but not in others.” According to the AFA, a corporation is downright “Against Christmas” if it “may use ‘Christmas’ […]