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Tag Archives: dow jones

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The Irregular Index

The Irregular Index made impressive gains today, ending at 97.11, slightly off its high above 98. What does this teach you about the American economy? Well, at least as much as watching the Dow Jones fluctuate throughout the day would teach you.

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Market Meltdown More Like A Softening

As the afternoon went on, and he stock market gained back a lot of the lost ground, Yahoo Finance kept the same headline. With the Dow down just around 350 points, it was still a Market Meltdown.

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House Passes Bailout Bill and Stocks Drop

The difference that’s been made now is that, along with the stock fluctuations, Wall Street firms are going to have 700 billion dollars more to play around with, and our nation itself is going to be 700 billion dollars further in debt.

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The 79 Point Crisis

It is your patriotic duty to stampede in a panicked herd, just like you did with the Iraq War and the Patriot Act. Don’t stop to think! Give Wall Street all your money right now or you are doomed!

Psst... what kind of person doesn't support pacifism?