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Christmas Emoticons for the Whole Family

¯¯\____(ツ)____/¯¯ What to get the Tetrarch who has everything. X * *** ***o* \ / ***o*** \ / (X╭╮X) *****o*** (-╭╮-) Uncle Bill and Uncle Ted still won’t talk to each other. **O*****o** **o****O***o* *******o**o**** **O**o********O** ******o**O*****o*** ! ! ____!_!____ \_________/ ____ | | _|__|_ (..) () Snowman tried liposuction against advice. ( ) >}:-)____? […]

Merry Krampusnacht 2014 – And The War On Krampusnacht

Tonight is Krampusnacht, the night when the wild hairy trickster of Yule goes cavorting around in the darkest shadows of the year.

They’re Krampusing in Chicago, and in Bloomington, too. Hell, they’re even putting on horns in Charlotte.

Graveyard Dirt writes, “Krampus is often described as a spirit of Christmas, but in truth, the character […]

As KrampusNacht Approaches, what’s the Skinny on your Favorite Holiday Beast? (Krampus Top Ten 2013)

Gimme that ol’ time religion, Gimme that ol’ time religion….

Yes, this is the picture of ol’ time religion, and it’s good enough for me. Long before a chubby guy in red and white felt became the face of Christmas, the beast called Krampus and other mummers like the Buttnmandl swept into European towns on […]

Krampusnacht The Quietest

If you’re like me, your life is already overflowing with holly-jolly. I fear that, if I have to hear Mariah Carey sing to me about what she wants for Christmas one more time, I will spend the rest of December in a soundproof underground bunker.

I enjoy a view of the open sky, so I […]

Five Days to KrampusNacht: Learn How to Make Krampus Marzipan

It’s five days to KrampusNacht, that traditional European holiday on which the Krampus beast roams the streets patting the two well-behaved children on the head and running after the remainder with birch switches.

How can you encourage respect for that Old-Time Religion (it’s good enough for you!) among the youth of today?

Make them a […]

Six Days to KrampusNacht: Celebrate Breakfast with Krampus

It’s six short days to KrampusNacht, the night when St. Nicholas’ predecessor and occasional companion roams through the streets of town, looking for naughty children to punish.

Krampus and the mumming tradition from which he stems predate modern Christmas folklore by many, many years, making Krampus a much more real “Reason for the Season.” […]

Spreading the Krampus Love, Little By Little

We change the culture in little ways every day when we don’t hide our differences. Last December, when my daughter’s elementary school class asked parents to share their family holiday traditions, I shared our family’s tradition of singing a Krampus song. Yesterday, a Valentine’s Day card to my daughter made its way home. How somewhat […]

Sharing a Holiday Tradition of Krampus at Elementary School

This year, my daughter’s third-grade class was asked to bring in parents to share family holiday traditions. One of the things my extended family has enjoyed doing over the past four years is singing this “Here Comes Krampus” song when we get together between the solstice and the new year. And so with posterboard in […]

A Frolicsome Krampus Tag — in the original spirit of Fun

It’s not strictly tied to the calendar, but December 5 is a traditional Krampustag (Day of Krampus) in which the creature historically associated with the old Yuletide stories makes his way through European towns and cities engaged in a bit of fun. “Fun” is a word that originally described trickery, quick-footed fooling or some other […]

Krampus Challenges Vlad The Impaler To Presidential Fiend Primary Election

Vlad the Impaler contests his legal status as a non-human fiend, given that, although he is now an undead creature of the night, he was born a human being. Both Krampus and Vlad the Impaler are expected to appear in the 6th Circuit Court tomorrow, where the legal status of Vlad the Impaler will be decided. […]

Krampus for President Campaign Pledges Separation Of Church And State

The way he’s acting these days, I expect Obama to install a giant crucifix on the White House roof, instead of those solar panels that he promised a while ago. They seem to think that the 2012 presidential election is a contest over who loves Jesus the most. Heck, I’m from Austria, and even I know that’s not the American way. […]