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School Me In Scottish independence

In a little bit more than a day from now, Scotland will vote about whether to become a country independent from the United Kingdom. I have no earthly clue why this matters.

I am an American completely unschooled in the injustices between the British nations.

What is there, besides independence itself, that the Scots wish […]

Minnesota To Rebel Against Union To Prevent Health Care Reform

Governor Tim Pawlenty will move Minnesota toward secession just in order to protect Minnesotans from improved access to affordable health care. […]

Tantrum Over Taxes in Texas

Timmy wants his money back? Fine. Someone from the government will give him all the raw gold he is entitled to, as soon as Timmy returns all the things that his money, his taxes, are supposed to pay for. […]

Do They Remember Goliad?

Yesterday, somewhere between one hundred and two hundred Texans gathered in Austin, demanding independence from the United States of America. Among those attending the rally organized by the Texas Nationalist Movement were two women carrying a sign decorated with a red arm, reading “Remember Goliad and the 400 massacred Texans. I’d rather sever my right […]

Go Ahead and Secede, Texas

You can tell a protest isn’t exactly a grassroots affair when the Governor is a scheduled speaker. But there Texas Governor Rick Perry was on April 15, smiling and lapping up the adulation of the Tea Party crowd that chanted “Secede! Secede! Secede!” Later on, he explained why he thought Texas’ secession from the United […]

2008 Secessionist Fantasy

With the new red nations of Chesapeake and Mackinac, a shared waterway is what defines the small national identity. The blue nation of Montana is landlocked, but it has a border with Canada. […]

The Split State Of America

Like the maple tree in my yard, the USA is in danger of splitting apart because it is comprised of two halves that have grown under radically different conditions. The right branch of the USA has grown in relative darkness, holding itself tight and closed, out of fear. The left trunk of the USA has grown in the light, more open in its habits. […]

Sarah Palin made Alaska Uber Alles Statement on June 8 of THIS year

So some slummy professional journalists have uncovered that Sarah Palin was a member of an Alaska Secessionist Party in the 1990s, a fringe group calling for Alaska to leave the United States of America. Kind of jars up against the whole “Country First” theme of the Republican National Committee, unless you note that they don’t […]