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Republicans In Congress Whine That Their Political Destiny Isn’t Coming True

If there really is a predetermined plan for greatness of the USA through journeys into outer space, then it will come to pass, and doesn’t need the help of a congressional resolution. If, on the other hand, there is no real outer space destiny of American Exceptionalism, well, what’s the big fuss about? Members of Congress can still get out toy spaceships and Star Wars action figures and play with them after all the interns have gone home. [...]

Founding Fathers Are Rain Gods, Says Tom Price

Congressman Price believes that George Washington, Benjamin Franklin, and Thomas Jefferson have all ascended into the clouds, transformed at the moment of their deaths into rain gods, dedicated to the punishment of all who attempt to help people get access to medical care. [...]